Say You'll Remember Me
by TokiioDoll
Summary: There were tears, heartbreak, and betrayal - and through it all they came out strong. But will love surpass all odds? Where they stand, what they desire, can they remain committed to love one another? Or will their love bring upon the separation they both feared? Sequal to: The Story You Never Knew
1. Prologue

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 ** _Sequel to: The Story You Never Knew_**

 ** _Time After Time_**

 ** _(QuietDrive)_**

 _ **If you're lost, you can look and you will find me**_  
 _ **Time after time**_  
 _ **If you fall, I will catch you, I'll be waiting**_  
 ** _Time after time, time after time,_**  
 _ **Time after time. . .**_

* * *

 ** _Prologue_**

 ** _(Kid Flash)_**

 ** _Three Years Ago_**

Crumbled walls and empty streets, cold and desolate. There was nothing here. Even with the millions of civilians crowding the area, the city itself still felt empty. It was the same thing everyday. You would have thought that middle school would bring upon a new era in my life. But nothing had changed. Everything was still the same. I. . . I was still the same.

 **"My parents are out for the night. Come by my house at 8."**

The text I'd received hours earlier from the blonde still had me questioning myself. If I went there then I knew what she'd ask from me, and that's why I felt hesitant. She was so willing to give herself away to me, eager to transform me into some guy I couldn't relate to in anyway. Her world, her crowd, that wasn't me. I wasn't meant to be the center of attention. But if I refused her, if I upset her and let her down then I'd be no better then the guy I was before. The guy who couldn't even save a little girl. . .

"Mom, I'm already on my way h-" A stranger spoke into her phone before clumsily crashing into me after stepping out of a convenience store. She stumbled backwards, dropping papers and a folder, and trying to catch her balance as I reached out and grabbed her by both arms. "I'm so sorry!" She apologized instantly, dropping to the floor to pick up her items while I followed in doing the same.

"It's fine." I nodded, picking up strange looking files and news reports of various cases. An odd thing to carry around at night, and judging by height she seemed fairly young to be an investigator. I probably would have questioned the situation too if our eyes hadn't met in that moment.

She was beautiful, like none other I had ever seen before. She seemed to match my own height, but her face looked like that of a younger child with long shimmering black hair running past her shoulders, round eyes, and a flawless complexion. Maybe it was her appearance that drew me in, or maybe it was the fact that when our hands touched it felt like a surge of electricity was coursing through my entire body, it could have even been her sweet smile that made it difficult to turn away - but something was drawing me in. A connection that made me feel strangely close to the stranger in front of me. Then again, it could have all just been in my head.

 _"Linda!"_ A voice shouted from the phone she carried in her hand, bringing her to push everything into her folder and answer the person on the other end.

"I'm heading there right now." She assured the other and grabbed her things before getting back up on her feet again to say, "Sorry again!" And ran off in the other direction.

Whoever she was, she left a strong impression.

"Welcome to Family Mart. Please feel free to ask for help if needed." The cashier hollered with a smile, and I replied with a quick nod before heading down the isles.

My main focus had to be on Stacy at this point. Whether I could give her what she wanted or not, I had to try. I couldn't let her down when she had placed so much faith in me. If I couldn't love her, or care for her in even the slightest, then I'd be responsible in hurting another innocent life again. I just needed to satisfy her until she got bored. Just until she could find someone else to replace me. After all, it's not like I'd be able to fit in with her or the rest of her crowd. I wasn't the big star on campus, and there's no way I could ever be. I was just me. The regular kid with too much homework on my hand.

Just a regular kid. . .

"Do you need any help miss?" One of the employees asked a girl searching in my isle. She seemed suspicious, and anyone would think so too if they saw someone like her walk in alone. She didn't seem like much of a threat, or much older than myself, but she was still strange looking for someone so young dressed in leather and a pair of dark shades. And it didn't help that her hair was dyed a bright pink color either. . .

"If I did, I would have asked." She spat, eyeing the man trying to do his job before he left the situation awkwardly. Normally I would have shrugged the whole thing off and ignored it. She wasn't causing me any harm or trouble in anyway. That was, until I noticed her shoving various items in her pockets and jacket.

I was no hero, and it wasn't my place to say anything. I was only thirteen. Not like I could have done much to stop her. But I couldn't let her go with all of that on her own. Despite my own sins, this was just morally wrong. That's why I had to speak up. . .

"You going to pay for that?" My question brought her to shoot her head up in my direction. I could feel her glaring at me through dark lenses, but it was too late for me to back out now. I either had to stop it or change the situation all together. . .

"Mind your own business, kid." She muttered under her breath and turned down the isle to leave.

"Wait!" I called out, running down to catch up with the girl ready to make a huge mistake in walking out of here that way. But before I could get too close she stopped and spun around, pulling out a knife to point at me.

"Don't make me do it." She threatened, trying to get me to turn around and ignore the situation. But there was something there. She wasn't angry or intimidating. She just seemed scared. I didn't know her or why she was doing any of this. But she was just a kid. She didn't seem that much older than me either, she just needed help. In fact, this whole act seemed like just that. A cry for help.

So, I didn't say anything. I didn't call for anyone. Instead, I pulled out my wallet and let her keep those items after handing her a hundred dollar bill. It might have been my entire allowance for the month, but judging by our roles I knew she needed it more. Even if she tried to deny it at first.

"Do I look like a charity case to you?" She asked scornfully, keeping the knife pointed at me the entire time.

"No," I shook my head and kneeled down to place the money on the ground, "Just think of it as me paying to keep myself alive." I joked, and withdrew from the situation by heading in the opposite direction.

I didn't look back at first. I didn't say anything and neither did she. But once I was inches away from the exit I _did_ glance back. There, I saw her. Standing by the cash register with the items in her hands, ready to pay without any trouble with the money she'd received. She was an odd one, whoever she was, and I knew I'd never see her again. But she reminded me a lot of someone else. That's why I couldn't help but smile. . .

 **Because she reminded me of** **_her_.**


	2. Chapter 1: Trust

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 _ **Somewhere Only We Know**_

 _ **(Keane)**_

 _ **And if you have a minute why don't we go**_  
 _ **Talk about it somewhere only we know?**_  
 _ **This could be the end of everything**_  
 _ **So why don't we go**_  
 _ **Somewhere only we know?**_  
 _ **Somewhere only we know?**_

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Trust**

 **Present Day**

 **(Kid Flash)**

"We rode all the way here on a stupid bike _just_ to eat _donuts_?" Rose complained, scrunching her nose after walking in and noticing the family sitting and enjoying various pastries at their table.

"There are other things on the menu, okay?" I assured her, fighting the urge to roll my eyes at her never ending attitude.

Even cities away she was still grumpy and negative. It was annoying no matter how you tried looking at it, but it relaxed me. Simply knowing she was here, next to me, was worth however she acted or behaved - because it was _her_. . . because she. . .

 _She_ was worth it.

The diner was practically empty when we arrived. The only people being there were the employees, us, and the family Rose couldn't keep her eyes off of. There was deep sadness in her eyes, envy even, anyone could see it. And it could have been for any reason honestly, but it seemed to me that she only appeared that way because she tried imagining herself in their shoes. To be part of a family, somewhere she belonged. .

That's what she wanted.

 _"They used us, toyed with us, tested on us, and morphed us into what we are today. I never wanted these powers. . . I never wanted any of this!"_

There was still so much I needed to know. So much more I needed to understand. That's why I had to bring her here myself. Somewhere I knew no one could bother or find us. Here we could be serious, we could be ourselves, we could be honest. And this time I'd be _fully_ honest with her. I would. Then, maybe, I'd get the answers I needed to better understand her and everything else. . .

"Hey there young man, table for one?" The waitress asked, coyly approaching with a pen in one hand and a menu in another.

"Two actually." I corrected her and took Rose's hand in mine to pull her into the conversation.

"Oh how sweet, you brought your little sister along with you." The woman smiled, staring down at the Adam's girl in an unusual manner.

"Actually, she's my girlfriend." I tried playing it cool, not wanting to make it sound like a bigger deal than it was - but it _was_. The fact that I could label her that way, just knowing she was _mine,_ and being able to say it out loud was nerve wrecking and _awkward_ , but it was a good kind of feeling. . .

"Oh. . ." The woman whispered quietly, letting her smile fall into a frown as she reached over a counter to grab another menu, "How odd. You two make a strange pair." She stated, bringing the Adam's girl to remove her hand out of mine in response. It was intimidating enough having to walk around campus together, but I wouldn't let her insecurities affect her elsewhere. Because whether or not she saw it or understood - she was perfect. Even if I was the only one who could see that. . .

"Well," I smiled and wrapped an arm around the smaller girls waist, "It's always good to stand out."

"Of course. . ." The waitress nodded, forcing what seemed like a smile before heading down the diner, "Follow me I'll guide you to your table."

"West. . ."

"Yeah?" I answered, staring down at the girl trying to speak before she elbowed me in the gut.

"I told you to stop touching me." She glared and moved on ahead to sit at the table we were given. I didn't say anything, or made too big of a scene, despite the pain she had inflicted on my body again, and followed in taking the seat across from the surprisingly aggressive dweeb I brought along. The whole time questioning why I couldn't stay away from her? Why I couldn't let her go myself? But then, the moment we were seated and our eyes met again - I knew the answer. . .

Because I was in love with her.

"Alright, just holler when you're ready to order." The woman explained, fluttering her eyelashes after handing me a menu and tossing the other over to the feline in disguise. "Take your time." She said with a smile and sauntered off in the other direction.

"Guess you're popular everywhere you go." The Adam's girl stated, opening her menu to skim through herself, and I couldn't help but laugh after realizing to whom she was referring to.

"Jealous much?"

"As if." She glared.

"Don't worry." I assured her, and pulled open my menu to mimic her, "I only have eyes for the girl sitting right in front of me."

"How often have you used that line before?" She asked, face flushing a bright red before she brought up her menu to hide behind.

"Lost count." I lied, hoping to get a reaction out of the emotionless robot that, to my surprise, let out a faint laugh in response.

"You're an idiot." She whispered.

"So I've been told." I nodded, watching as she brought her menu back down to meet my gaze, "So what do you want? I'm buying."

"I can pay for myself." She squinted.

"I don't trust where your money came from. . ." I mumbled quietly, knowing very well that the stacks of cash she carried around were most likely stolen than earned, "Besides, I wanna pay."

"Fine." She shrugged, closing her menu to slide over to the corner, "I'll just have whatever you're having."

"Where's the fun in that?" I asked, reaching over to slide the menu back in front of her, "Don't you have a favorite meal?"

"Do you?" She raised a brow.

"Uh, yeah. Breakfast servings are always the best. Eggs, bacon, sausage - all that junk."

"I've never been much of an eater." She said tonelessly and slid the menu back in the corner to where she had left it.

"I can tell. If you get any thinner the wind will probably carry yo. . ." I stopped myself from finishing that sentence, noticing the angry stare she was sending off again. I thought quick, I spoke fast, hoping to fix it before I messed up again and said, "I mean, who doesn't love flying?" I laughed quietly, mostly to myself seeing that she made no other reaction than rolling her eyes.

"Food's a necessity to survive. That's it. It's not exactly something I'd choose to indulge myself in for fun."

"Well that's a boring way to look at it." I furrowed my brows and raised my hand up to count on each finger as I continued, "You've never been to an arcade, a park, ridden a bike, and now you're saying you hate food too?"

"I never said I hated it, but I guess you learned to appreciate it more than I did growing up."

"Meaning?" I cocked my head to one side.

"I had to work for my meals. We all did, and it was mostly just grains and water. . ." She shrugged and let her eyes wander around the rest of the area. Most likely back to the family still enjoying their meals together.

"So, you've never had a proper breakfast before?"

"I guess not."

"Breakfast for dinner it is then." I concluded, taking my menu to place over hers in the corner.

"Seriously?"

"Just trust me." I grinned, ignoring the bored look she carried.

"You say that a lot, you know?" She stared, folding her arms on her chest.

"And have I ever steered you wrong?"

"Not yet."

"Not _ever_." I answered immediately after her, and I could tell by the look in her eyes that she hadn't expected it. She was still learning, still trying to get used to this - to trusting me. But she was allowing herself to, and that was a good sign. But then it was quiet again, and I heard her clear her throat before she turned away to gaze out the window. This was my chance. My only opportunity to better understand her and get some answers. It had to be now. . .

Or it'd be never.

"What kind of work was it?"

"Excuse me?" She returned her attention back to me, confused by my question.

"You said they made you work for your meals. . ." Her face morphed from confusion to her usual blank expression. Even so, I knew she was scared. She was hiding something and she didn't want to tell me. Why or What, was what I needed to figure out myself. And I would, eventually, even if I had to force it out of her. . .

"Some thing's are better left unshared." She said after releasing a shuddering breath. I could have let it go and waited for her to tell me on her own when she was ready - but when would that be? Tomorrow? Months from now? Years? I couldn't wait that long. I couldn't watch her drown in her own misery without knowing anything about it. She had to tell me, she had to speak up, then, maybe, I could be someone she could lean on. Someone she could trust in. . .

"Rose, you can tell me." I leaned in closer, reaching over to take her hand, "I told you I'd listen."

She studied me for a moment, eyes watching me hard and serious. As if debating with herself whether or not she could really share what it was that haunted her. The past that I myself still knew very little about, even if I had played a small role in it once. There were still secrets, cover ups, and I needed to know them. Because as long as she kept hiding it there'd always be something blocking us. And that's the last thing we needed right now. . .

"Do you normally start off your dates by digging into other peoples pasts?" She asked, sliding her hand out of mine as she leaned further back in her seat.

"Makes for a great conversation." I shrugged, making her laugh slightly as I tried locking eyes with her again, "But seriously. I want to know everything, the good and bad. All of it."

We sat there in silence for a moment. She sat up straight, taking in a deep breath before letting out a heavy sigh. She made circles on the table with her finger, letting her eyes wander around them until she raised her head up to look at me. She was scared. She was always scared, and when she wasn't then she was angry. But she never seemed happy. Not really, and that's why I wanted to listen. I wanted to know what it was that kept her going back to whatever plagued her thoughts. At least that way I could be of some use to her. At least that way. . .

I wouldn't feel so useless.

"It was more like training then work. When they took us away. . ." She began, inhaling deeply as she stared out the window one more time, "You trained to get stronger, to improve your skills and if you couldn't. . .you'd get punished."

"Punished?"

"Beatings, starving," She glanced back at me, smiling as if she found the whole thing strangely humorous, "Or if you really messed up they'd get rid of you entirely."

"What do you mean they. . ." I stopped to watch her closely, noticing her eyes staring past my shoulder. She was slipping away again, and I knew asking anymore would endanger her mentality, but I had to know. . . "Rose, did people die in -"

"Seymour tried to protect me once." She spoke monotonously, unmoving, and expressionless. She was going back, she was getting drawn back to whatever it was that ruined her. She was reliving it all over again in her mind. . .

But she was only halfway gone.

"My big mouth got us in trouble and it cost him his sight." She whispered, striking worry into me as her eyes began to move back in forth. As if she were searching for something that wasn't there anymore. . . "I can still hear it. I can still hear his screams. . . all of them-"

"Rose." I called out to her, taking her hand again and squeezing it tightly to retrieve her from wherever she had gone. And it worked. Her head quickly turned to me, eyes and all, now focused on me. Then, she smiled. But it wasn't genuine. It wasn't sincere. It was to cover up what she felt needed to be kept hidden, masking it just like I had done so many times before.

"It was survival of the fittest." She continued, holding onto my hand tightly as she thought back to it again, "They were training weapons. The weak couldn't survive there and no one could leave. It was a live or die kind of situation."

"How did you-"

"How did we escape?" She cut in, smiling at the idea of it on her own, "Once we were strong enough and knew every inch of the place by heart, it was pretty easy to break out. It was staying alive that was the hard part. . ."

"Rose. . ."

"Your turn." She muttered, sliding her hand out of mine to scoot in closer.

"Me?"

"You got a glimpse of my past. What about yours?" She asked, folding her arms on the table.

"What do you wanna know?" I asked, ready to open up on whatever she felt she needed to know. It was me who wanted there to be no secrets, not wanting to keep up any walls that would block us from better understanding one another. But I hadn't expected her to jump straight into something else. . .

"Stacy. . ." Hearing her name out loud brought my smile to fade. It had only been hours ago that I had said goodbye to the blonde, and I wasn't sure if I was ready to talk about her just yet. Even so, she kept trying to ask, "All of this started when you met her, right?"

"It was more than just her." I shook my head, not wanting her to get the impression that the blonde was to blame for any of this. It was me who steered her in the wrong direction. I had lead her on and I had hurt her. Which was why I didn't want her to take the blame, even if she had been the root to most of my problems. . .

"She said you were her first." My head shot up to stare at the girl in shock. It was true, but it was something I'd hoped she'd never find out. That was why I tried keeping them away from one another. Why I'd hoped Stacy would have kept it to herself. Because I didn't want to give off the wrong impression. I didn't want Rose to judge me for it, and I had hoped she wouldn't. . .

But that didn't seem like it at all.

"I made a lot of mistakes in the pa-"

"Mistakes?" She laughed mockingly as she sat back in her seat in disbelief. She was judging me, judging the blonde in her absence, when she didn't understand the situation at all. And as much as I tried not to let it get to me, she was starting to tick me off. . .

"Look, I couldn't tell her how I felt without upsetting her. I was a dumb kid and I figured the best way to keep her happy was to-"

"Have sex with her? Yeah, because that makes sense." She scoffed, shaking her head in disapproval as if she were all high and mighty. I knew why she was mad. My past wasn't something I was proud of in anyway, but it wasn't something I could change either. Yet, suddenly, she seemed disgusted by me all together.

"So what? You're mad because I had sex with her?"

"I just think its stupid you gave it away so easily-"

"You know what? You're no virgin yourself which means you can't. . ." And there it was, my anger getting the better of me by taking it out on her instead. A hurt expression flashed instantly before she forced herself to mask it.

It was wrong of me to have said anything, and I knew that. Everything she had said about me was true. I was the screw up, and I had messed up before, but that's why I didn't want to admit it. I didn't want to admit that she was right about me, or at least with who I used to be. But she was. She always was, and in my denying it I blamed her for something she couldn't control. Instead, I made it worse by making her believe that everything she thought about _herself_ was true - even when it wasn't. I didn't care about her past, and I wasn't trying to judge her for it, because she hadn't asked for it to happen. But, like always, I had messed up again. . .

"Rose, I'm sorry. . ."

"No, you're right." She nodded, taking in a deep shuddering breath, "I, of all people, have no right to judge."

"I didn't mean it like-"

"So, did we come all the way out here just to eat breakfast?" She changed the subject, taking both menus in her hand to raise them for the waitress to come over.

"Uh, no. . ." I shook my head, hoping to fix everything after dinner. At least then I could take her to where we were suppose to be. That way I could apologize better and get her to see that she was more than just her past. She was more than what others thought. She was more than what _she_ thought. She. . .

She was perfection.

"No? Then why did we-"

"For that." I tapped on the window and pointed at the view of the ocean.

"T-The water. . .?" Her eyes widened in fear and shock. I figured she'd be scared of the water. She was the only kid at our school that managed to drown in the pool on campus after all. But there was something she could do there that I felt would help. It would mean taking bigger steps, but I was determined to help her move past all of this. And maybe, I'd gain her trust in return. But still, it was fun messing with her when she looked at me like that. . .

 **"We're going swimming."**

* * *

 **Quick NOTE:**

 **In case there was any more confusion. No, the story itself hasn't changed. The prologue was made to show that Wally and Rose had encounter one another during their younger teen years when he was still in middle school. There's a reason for it, a reason why I decided to bring Linda into this story all together. But you kinda have to pay close attention if you wanna figure that out. . .**

 **The rest of the chapters will continue forward based on where I left off on the last chapter of The Story You Never Knew. Nothing has changed so don't worry.**

 **Thank you for the support.**

 **-Clover**


	3. Chapter 2: My Escape

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 **Anywhere But Here**

 _ **(Mayday Parade)**_

 _ **Secret love, my escape**_  
 _ **Take me far far away**_  
 _ **Secret love, are you there**_  
 _ **Will you answer my prayer**_  
 _ **Please take me anywhere but here**_  
 _ **Anywhere but here**_

* * *

 **Chapter 2: My Escape**

 **Jinx**

We walked along the sand without our shoes and watched our footprints disappear in seconds. The wind blew softly against us as we stood over the lapping brown water. The air was mixed in with the ocean, and it gave off a familiar scent, but I couldn't quite put my finger on _why_ it reminded me so much of my youth. It just seemed as if the ocean itself were similar to my own life. Long, empty, and leading straight into the unknown. That's what separated me from the redhead standing in the distance, smiling like the sun itself. . . because he was more like the sky. There he had clouds, he had rain, he had stars, he had everything. He was never alone, and I would always be there - watching him from below in envy. That's why he could never understand me. No matter how hard he tried. He could never understand. . .

The emptiness.

"Yup! Gotta love that summer breeze." He hummed, stretching his arms out far and wide with a smile on his face.

"We're in Autumn." I corrected him.

"Same thing." He waved me off while placing a white plastic box into his bag.

"Did you really have to keep the leftovers?" I had to ask.

"What was I suppose to do? Throw it all away?"

"Yes." I answered dully, as he held the box in his arms again as if it were his own precious child.

"How cruel!" He sniffed, wiping away tears that were non-existent. I fought the urge to laugh, knowing very well that was what he wanted, and turned to face the ocean again. A long never-ending blue that sent small waves washing over my toes. It was beautiful, relaxing even, but all at the same time - frightening.

"You dont actually expect me to go swimming in that, do you? It's freezing." I shivered, hoping that would be enough to convince him in leaving. The idea of even plunging in _too_ deep would set me off immediately. There was no way I could ever go in there, not alone or even with him beside me. I couldn't. . . not like this.

Not ever.

"Nah," I heard him mumble by my ear before placing his jacket over my shoulders. "Just thought it'd be funny to get a reaction out of you." He grinned, mocking me in a playful manner that I didn't find even the slightest bit amusing. Which, as payback, made me feel the need to kick him in the knee right after.

"Ow!" He screamed, hopping on one leg to rub his so called 'injury'.

"Did that hurt?" I asked in false concern.

"Yeah!"

"Good." I shrugged and returned my attention back to the deep blue water, "So, what _are_ we here for then?"

"For this. . ." He said and dropped to the ground to pull out a notebook, a pen, and an empty soda bottle from his backpack.

"What's that?"

"Therapy." He said casually, never meeting my eyes as I watched him scribble something onto the first blank sheet.

"Therapy? Since when have you ever needed therapy?"

"It's not for me." He said quietly before he raised his head to look up at me, "It's for you."

"For me?" I eyed him oddly, puzzled by the situation and what his intentions were in all of this.

"I did some research in the computer lab on a few methods people used to try and cope with trauma's - like PTSD. . ."

"You think I have post traumatic stress disorder?" I scoffed, laughing at the idea of ever being diagnosed with something as ridiculous as that. But he didn't answer my question. No, he just kept speaking as if he were certain about everything else on his own.

"Anyway, there were some people who tried writing down the things they couldn't let go of. Everything that hurt them or upset them, and then they'd place the letter in a bottle to send into the sea. It seemed like a fun idea to try-"

"There's just one problem." I stopped him, tossing the jacket he had given me onto the ground, "I don't have anything to write about, because I don't have _PTSD_."

" _Really?_ " He raised a brow at me, "It didn't seem like that to me."

"Well you're not me." I said loudly and stomped away from him to leave on my own. It wasn't his idea that I hated, or the fact that he tried diagnosing me with something as ridiculous as that, but it was because he was still assuming things on his own. He didn't know me, or my past, or anything about me at all honestly. Which gave him no right to label me with anything. . .

No one could.

"Rose, please." He followed, "I know how mad you are at _everyone_ and I just want to help-"

"Why?" I whipped around, "Wally, _this_ isn't going to fix me."

"This isn't about _fixing_ you, it's about helping you." He took my hand, holding it tightly to pull me in closer and keep me from running away, because he knew that was exactly what I was planning. That was how I dealt with my supposed ' _trauma_ ', by avoiding it. If I didn't admit it, if I refused to acknowledge what had happened then none of it would be real. That was my method. My medicine.

That was how I survived.

"Please," He pleaded, eyes full of worry after meeting mine, "Tell me why you're so angry all the time."

"This is stupid. . ." I tried to laugh, hoping he would turn it into some kind of joke like he always did. That way we could move past it all and leave. That was what I wanted. That was how I'd stay tied together. . .

"A wall. . ." He mumbled softly, barely audible for my ears to catch.

"What?"

"Just think of me as a wall. Let it all out right here." He stepped back, releasing my hand as he moved further away from me.

"You can't be ser-"

"Begin." He shut his eyes tightly, back faced toward me as he held arms out horizontally. I wasn't sure if he was kidding or not, and I tried to laugh to make him stop. . .

But he didn't say anything.

"Wally enough. . ." I demanded once, but received nothing in response.

"I'm not doing this." I tried again, folding my arms over my chest to get him to realize that I wasn't messing around this time. But again. . .

There was nothing.

"C'mon, this isn't funny." I shook his shoulders, trying to get him to make some form of expression or reaction. And it worked. . . somewhat.

"Wally's not here right now." He whispered.

"I'm looking right at you." I glared.

"No you're not. I can't see you."

"Then open your eyes." I ordered, anger rising as he continued annoying me with his stupid games again.

"Can't do that. I'm just a wall."

"Fine, you want me to get mad?" I snapped, stomping on his foot to bring him hopping on one leg again in pain.

"Hey!"

"There, I'm mad. Are you happy now?" I yelled, aggravated by everything he had tried to do and shoved past him to leave. This was stupid, coming here, agreeing to any of this. It was all stupid. And I was tired of listening to all of it. I was tired of him trying to understand me on any level because he couldn't. That was just a fact. He wasn't me, he wasn't there, and I was okay with that. I was okay with the idea that he would never be able to share my pain or relate to it in anyway. As long as he'd help me forget then I'd be okay. But instead, he tried doing the opposite. . .

And that's what annoyed me the most.

"Rose just listen to me for a sec-"

"No, you listen!" I shouted, pointing my finger at him to stop him from breaking the distance I'd created, "You think talking about it is going to make me okay? Like it'll miraculously change everything? But you don't know any of-"

"Then tell me!" He shouted back, stepping inches closer to get his own word in, "I won't know unless you talk to me."

"What do you want me to say?" I dropped my hand, feeling that all of this was pointless. Me trying to get him to see the facts, and him trying to get something he couldn't fully relate to, it was pointless. It was all just _pointless._

"Everything. All of it, good and bad, I want to hear it all!"

"No you don't." I laughed hysterically, hoping to fight the tears with false humor, "You think you do but you don't!"

"Yes I do!" He persisted, reaching to grasp my arm again, "You just have to be honest with me. You have to tell me what happened?"

"I can't!" I spat, wrenching my arm away.

"Yes, you can!"

"No I can't-"

"Why!?"

"Because they broke me!" And there it was. The confession I dreaded now echoing in screams. The tears I fought escaped and fell on their own will, despite my orders in keeping still. Nothing was going my way. Nothing ever did. And judging by the look in the redheads eyes I knew he finally saw it too. The filthy, damaged, sack of baggage I truly was. . .

How disgusting.

"That's it." I shrugged, wiping and sniffling after dropping my gaze, "They broke all of us and turned me into a _monster_."

"Rose. . ." I winced at the stinging pain in my chest after hearing him whisper my name. I didn't want to do this anymore. I didn't want to keep being _me_ anymore. I just wanted to sink into the ocean itself, then, maybe, I could be what I always wanted to be. . .

Free.

"This wasn't suppose to be my life." I trembled, clenching both fists to maintain control, "I wanted to be normal, I wanted a _real_ family, and friends-"

"You can still have all of that." He cut me off, trying to state his point before I could even finish. But he was wrong. He was _so_ wrong. . .

"No, I can't. . . " I cried, slipping off my ring to reveal my true character. The beast I couldn't outrun, because it had swallowed all of me, or at least who I used to be, a long time ago. . . "I'm a freak."

"No, you're not." He stepped forward, placing both hands on the side of my face to catch my eyes. He was staring into me, gazing deeply, but it felt like he was seeing right through me. As if he were watching the girl I used to be rather than the person I'd become. . .

"Look at me Wally!"

"I am!" He screamed back, bringing more tears to fall at seeing how blind he truly was. . .

"But you're not. . ." I shook my head, swallowing shuddering breaths as I struggled to speak clearly, "If you were, then you'd understand that the little girl you thought you knew was never real. I. . . " I pushed away from him, holding myself with trembling hands as I forced myself to accept it, to accept the truth. . . "I'm not clean anymore. I never was. . ."

There was silence. There was breathing. There was the sound of the ocean crashing against the shore. But there were no words exchanged for long, dreadful, minutes. Just silence and his eyes watching me as I fought an internal battle with myself. The good and bad, it didn't feel like I belonged to either side. I didn't belong anywhere. It was just me. My side. Alone and forgotten. That. . .

That was where I stood.

"Then let's fix that." He broke the silence with his strange words before he gripped my wrist and yanked me toward the water. I was uncertain with what he was planning, and I couldn't tell if he was angry or not. But there was water. He was pulling me into it and all of me began to panic. I wanted to scream, I wanted to runaway, but he just kept gripping me tighter so that I wouldn't leave. . .

Not yet anyway.

"W-What are you doing?" I forced myself to ask, not wanting to cause a bigger scene with anyone that might have noticed us. But it was hard _not_ to scream, it was hard _not_ to panic when I was only inches away from plummeting into one of my biggest fears. And then, he spoke again. . .

"Do you trust me?" He squeezed my hand, as if fearing that I would give him an answer he didn't want to hear. So, I said nothing. Despite my hesitance, I couldn't say yes or no, because I was still unsure about him myself. Whether I could give him everything I was, or share the thoughts that I dreaded in even telling my own teammates about. He shouldn't have been special. He shouldn't have, yet. . . I couldn't turn away. Instead, I held his hand and followed without needing to say anymore. Whether I trusted him or not didn't matter now, because I knew part of me truly wanted to. . .

We stepped in slowly, cold water biting at my ankles and shooting through my entire body. I was shivering, and so was he, but the warmth exchanged through our hands was enough to keep us going. And we kept going, at least until the water reached to the mid of my waist. And it was beautiful, the view seen close up of the setting sun hitting it's final rays over the water. The horizon, the sky, the ocean, they both met in half way. Melting into one another and becoming one. It was a beautiful sight, and it gave me hope. Hope that one day. . .

That could be us.

"Close your eyes." He whispered into my ear, releasing my hand to move behind me and grab onto both of my arms.

"W-What?" I stuttered, suddenly feeling the urge to panic until he spoke again and said. . .

 **"Just trust me."**

And I tried to. I waited for him to take each hand and extend them outward before the world fell dark. The soft breeze could be heard clearer this way, the ocean felt as if it were sinking into me, and the touch of his hands were warmer than ever before. Everything felt real like this. It felt better this way, because it reminded me that this wasn't just a dream. He was here, I was here, and this was how we'd remember it. How I'd want to remember him, even if I'd have to wake up one day and realize how foolish this might have been. I still wanted to believe. . .

I wanted to believe in him.

"Do you feel it now?" He asked, his voice like a light guiding me through the darkness I sealed myself in.

"Feel what?"

"The ocean. . ." He whispered, breathing close to my ear that it sent shivers down my spine, "It's washing it away."

My eyes shot open in response. I wasn't sure what he was referring to and I couldn't find it in me to ask, but part of me felt it knew the answer. Even before he said anything, even when I stood watching the sun painting the sky in beautiful bright colors, I knew. I knew because it was me, because it was my past. . .

I just knew.

"The memories, the _dirt_ , whatever it is. . ." He paused, letting my hands go to wrap his arms around my body as we stood watching the scene together, "Let the ocean wash it away. . ."

I laughed. I laughed so that I wouldn't cry. I laughed so that he wouldn't look at me strangely. I laughed because I wanted something as ridiculous as that to be true. I laughed, even though tears still managed to fall. Not because I was sad, or because I didn't think it would work, but because I was happy. I could feel joy finally making its way to my heart, and that's where he was. There, waiting for me all along, and when I gazed up at the clouds I could see it. Him, me, us. . .

In our castle in the sky.

"You think that'll work?" I asked him, curious to see what his answer would be.

"Not completely," He whispered softly, arms clutching me tighter to bury his face in my hair, "But only because you still don't see it. . ."

"See what?" I asked in a whisper, pulling away to turn around and look at the redhead with eyes burning a bright red. He was crying, and that made me want to cry even more, because I understood now. He knew he couldn't relate to me, he couldn't share my pain, but he was trying to. He wanted to, and that's why. . .

I was falling in love with him.

"Perfection." He mumbled, staring down for a second to lock his fingers with mine, "You think that they're filth is still stuck on you, that it defines everything you are. . ." He paused, eyes moving slowly to meet my own, "But all I see is you. The stubborn, annoyingly, _accurate_ dweeb right here - and to me, that's _perfection_."

We watched one another, my eyes stuck on sapphire ones. There had been many moments like this before. Moments where our eyes had met this way, signaling what it was he wanted. But all he had done was give. He kept giving, trying to prove himself to me when I knew that he wasn't the real threat. I knew that, yet I never once assured him of it. And so, I did what I felt I should have done a long time ago. Something he initiated all those other moments before. Now. . .

It was my turn.

Pulling him forward, my lips pressed against the redhead's before either of us could question what to do next. This was what I wanted, what he desired, and that was no longer something I feared. I let it happen, I let him kiss me back so that we could connect, passionately, lovingly, even if it was in secret. And suddenly the desire to lose myself in him took over.

My body felt overheated as it pressed up against him, his fingers massaging themselves into bubblegum pink hair. And it was amazing, being close to him in such a way, lips moving over one another in rhythm as he lifted me off the ground to carry me in his arms. My legs wrapped around his waist as I let whatever was meant to happen - happen. Because this. . . this was what I wanted. Something straight out of a fairy tale. The kind you'd read as a child, the kind that I myself despised and refused to believe in. This. . .

This was my fairytale.

And I wanted nothing more but for it to be eternal. For it to continue without an end. I wanted to simply remain here, with him, forever, like this. I wanted him more than anything without any hesitance or doubt. . .

I just wanted _him_.

Then, one step led us in the wrong direction and separated us after he clumsily tripped backwards. Our body's crashing into the water and ending the moment I had hoped would last longer. But I wasn't mad. I wasn't sad or upset. I was happy that it ended. I was happy that my body fell into the icy cool ocean, because it proved everything. It proved that this was real, that he was real, and that what had happened was all real. My feelings, the kiss, they all made sense now. And for the first time in my life, I no longer felt fear or anger or sadness. Simply, just. . .

Happiness.

"Jinx!" I heard him call for me, arms digging through the water to pull me out. He kneeled over, hair dripping wet as he looked at me in deep concern. This was who he was. This was the guy that had won me over after all my efforts in avoiding him. It was useless, and perhaps it had always been useless, because no matter what he did or where we were - I couldn't help but be drawn back to him. Like the light at the end of a tunnel. . .

He was there to guide me through it all.

"Idiot!" I coughed, sitting up to catch my breath and trying desperately to rub the stinging sea water out of my eyes.

"I'm so sor-"

"Moron!" I yelled, splashing water into his face as he fell back to try and spit it out. It was disturbing and humorous that I couldn't help but laugh at his childish behavior. And in response, he sat back up, pouting like a child before copying my own actions in return.

"Hey!" He laughed, splashing water in my direction before I ran back up to dodge it.

It went on like that for a while. The two of us acting as immaturely as children, trying to aim at one another in a heated battle both of us were determined to win. I'm not sure how long it went on, how many minutes or hours were wasted playing in the ocean. But it was a memory I knew I would always cherish, because there, that day, in that moment, I was certain I had found it. The one thing that I felt could keep me together forever. My one and only. . .

 **Sweet Escape.**


	4. Chapter 3: One Day

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 ** _Sequel to: The Story You Never Knew_**

 **Unexpectedly**

 _ **(Jason Chen)**_

 _ **Oh no it's not that I planned to**_  
 _ **But I think it feels like maybe I'm falling for you and me**_  
 _ **Just don't know**_  
 _ **Oh were we ever meant to be**_  
 _ **Suddenly, oh, you caught me so off guard**_  
 _ **We fell in love so unexpectedly, so unexpectedly**_

* * *

 **Chapter 3: One day**

 **Kid flash**

The aroma of bleach and laundry detergent mixed with the air outside of the Laundromat. The sky shimmered with brightly lit stars, it's only other companion being that of the full moon, as we watched laying over dry grass. It was chilly outside, and there was no doubt that she was probably cold too, but neither of us seemed to mind. I was at ease just having her there next to me, holding her hand, while secretly wishing that everyday could be spent like this. Even if it could only exist as a fantasy now. I wished on every star that we could continue like this. Just us, no one else, together. . .

Forever.

"We should run away. . ." My thoughts escaped through words accidentally spoken out loud. I knew she wasn't happy with the idea after slipping her hand out of mine. She was quiet, sitting up to bring her knees close to her chest, while staring down at the silver ring on her finger. She was tied to them, to her team, and no matter who I was, or where I stood, I wasn't enough to make her feel safe. . .

Not now at least.

"I'm kidding." I laughed, pushing myself up to sit next to her.

"Actually, that doesn't sound all that bad. . ." She shrugged, a small smile forming before she raised her head up to stare at the moon again.

"Then let's go." I nudged her playfully, smiling to hint my humor in something I was _half_ -serious about.

"I couldn't go just like that. . ." She shook her head.

"Then I'll kidnap you." My words made her laugh slightly as she lowered her eyes to stare at the grass.

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea either." She shrugged, eyes slowly travelling back to mine, "But you couldn't do it."

"Oh? Says who?"

"Says your life. You have friends and family here. It wouldn't work for you." She explained, plucking out weeds from the small hill we sat on.

"It doesn't have to be forever. I mean, I could call 'em up one day. Let 'em know how I've been doing-"

"That's not running away. That's called taking a vacation." She rolled her eyes, tossing weeds over on my lap before she laid on her back again.

"Call it what you must." I shrugged, enjoying the sound of her laughter until a sudden buzz went off to interrupt.

"That's our stuff." She muttered, and I hopped back up on my feet to zip over to the machine we'd been waiting on all this time.

"You know," She began before entering the building, "I've been thinking about this for a while now, but isn't that considered cheating?" She asked, making her way over to the dryer I stood by to retrieve our items.

"Is _what_ considered cheating?" I asked.

"Playing sports with your speed."

"It's not my fault I'm gifted." I shrugged, separating her clothing from my own.

" _Right_." She said sarcastically.

"Just take your stuff." I joked, tossing her belongings in her face. All in good fun, but it was still expected for her to smack me across the head. She had a hard hand, despite how small it looked, and soft it felt, it still hurt. But it was a good kind of pain, because it meant that she was really here. She was really beside me, next to me, laughing with me. . .

She was mine.

"Why are you always the one responsible for getting my clothes wet." She mumbled, pulling her dried top over her undershirt, "First the video incident, then the pool, and now the beach?"

"Hey, at least I helped you dry off this time. Besides, you still haven't picked up that dress you left at my place." I reminded her, pulling my arms into the sleeves of my now dried jacket.

"You could have tossed it out." She furrowed her brows, pulling her frizzy dark hair back.

"I'll keep that in mind the next time you leave something behind." I joked, closing the dryer door and allowing my thoughts to slip out on their own as she stared out the window, "But it did look good on you. The dress I mean. . ."

Her head spun back in my direction, her attention now on me. It was a compliment, I had given them before, if not to other girls then to friends or family, but it was weird saying it to her. Not bad, but it was embarrassing in the sense that one couldn't really guess how she'd react to it. She was difficult to read almost all the time. Her reactions and thoughts were always shocking to witness. Like now, despite how difficult it was to express how I felt about her out loud, it was worth seeing her blush that way. Her rosy cheeks were a confirmation of how _she_ felt. That's what made spending more time with her exciting, because it was challenging, it was different - but even if it wasn't, even if we were just some boring, dull, couple who sat around doing nothing, I wouldn't have cared. It didn't matter how she acted, or how we were whenever we were together, just as long as we _were_ together. . .

Then I'd be happy.

"I-I'm surprised you even noticed me at all with Linda as your date. . ." She let out a weird laugh, forced and uncomfortable, but she avoided my eyes. Which gave way to the idea that it wasn't the dress she was referring to now. . . it was her sister.

"Getting jealous again?" I grinned, rubbing my shoulder up against hers.

"I don't get jealous." She turned away, crossing her arms over her chest, "I just felt uncomfortable seeing the two of you together like that. . ."

"That's the definition of jealousy." I chuckled, watching her walk over to the door

"Call it what you must." She shrugged, leaning her back against a wall as she watched me hop on top of one of the machines to sit on.

"Well, if we're being honest," I began, glancing over my shoulder to view the girl staring at the floor, "I never actually intended on taking her that night."

"Because of Stacy?" She tried to guess, sadness mixed in her tone as she tried to keep a straight face after saying the girls name out loud. She was still debating, I could sense it, on whether she could trust me or not. My reputation was bad enough, and I had let her down more than once on campus, but I was tired of hurting her. I was sick of seeing her upset over something I couldn't change, not that I blamed her, but I hated being responsible for any of that. I hated making her feel doubtful all the time. . .

I just _hated_ it.

"No. . ." I paused for a moment, waiting for her head to look up and lock eyes with me so that I could admit it, "It was because of you. . ."

"M-Me?" She stuttered, eyebrows furrowing again in disbelief.

"I almost asked you, but I figured it'd be weird if I did it out of the blue. Then Stacy got involved, and Linda was there so. . . I asked her instead." I waited for her reaction, feeling myself shrink the longer she took to speak.

"Well, you were right. It would have been weird. . ." She nodded, agreeing with my logic as she tried pulling a strand of hair behind her ear, "But I'm glad you shared that with me." She smiled, steadying the pace of my heart in relief as she walked around the room quietly. A smile still on her face, rare, and beautiful all together. A sight that I loved to see whenever she was willing to show it, because it was a glimpse of happiness - her happiness. And a sign that I was doing what I was supposed to have done long ago. . .

Making her happy.

"You should really throw that dress out, though. It's not like I'll ever wear it again anyway. . ." She changed the subject, nervous yet eager to continue the conversation.

"You sure? It looked pretty expensive."

"Don't worry," She smirked, holding her hand up to wiggle her fingers, "I used the five finger discount."

"Spoken like a true felon," I shook my head, jumping off the machine to stand on my feet, "I'm just gonna pretend I didn't hear that."

"Your choice." She shrugged, heading further down the room until she spotted the TV hanging in the corner of the ceiling. It was odd, the way she suddenly stopped to stare at it, or at least it was unexpected. That was, until I noticed what it was she was fixated on.

"It was you, wasn't it?" She said in almost a whisper that made it difficult to fully catch her words correctly. But I knew something bad was coming, it always did when it regarded her past, and that's what was going on now. Me, her, and the television still highlighting the old house reporters were going on about. That's when I knew it'd be bad, because I never told her. We had never discussed it, not because the timing was off or because we couldn't bring it up, but because I was avoiding it. I was hoping it wouldn't need to be spoken about again, because I didn't want to ruin everything that had happened up till now. I didn't want her past to draw a wedge between us. . .

Not again.

"What?" I laughed nervously, avoiding the screen as I kept my eyes focused on just her. Even when she turned to look back at me, eyes angry and upset, I kept on smiling. Hoping she would drop it, praying it wouldn't go back to that. . .

But it did.

"You led the titans there, didn't you?" She asked, her voice stern and firm as she waited for a confirmation. That's when my smile faded, when the seriousness of the topic finally surfaced between us. There was no point in hesitating, avoiding it, or joking about it. She knew, and this was something we couldn't ignore any longer.

"I had to do it."

"Why?" She asked quickly, anger and rage now present, "Why couldn't you have just left it alone?"

"You know why?" I laughed, running a hand through damped hair to cool down for a moment. I didn't want this to turn into an argument, I didn't want to get mad, I _didn't_ \- but I wasn't going to lie to her. I wasn't going to hide my reasons for any of it. Not anymore. . . "What did you expect, Rose? There were still kids living there. Did you honestly think I'd just let that go and pretend I didn't know what was really going on in-"

"Yes!" She yelled, flailing her arms in the air, "Do you seriously think by going in there that you somehow saved them?"

"Yeah, I do. I did. _We_ did." I tried walking closer, reaching for her arms only to be rejected in her backing away.

"You heroes have no sense of reality whatsoever. . ." She scoffed with an angry stare fixed on me, "This wasn't just one kid, it was dozens. That means a few of them will probably be placed into another home just like that one."

"You don't know that for-"

"Wally, the foster care system has always worked against children. You didn't save them, you just gave them false hope." She shook her head, shoving past me to leave as I walked after her to match her pace.

"Those kids are safe."

"For how long?" She whipped around, creating silence for a moment as I struggled to give her a proper answer, "Face it west, you can't save everyone." She whispered, moving for the exit until she was pulled back by my reaching for her arm.

"I can try!"

"You'll fail!" She screamed, snatching her arm back to leave.

"Because I failed you?" I asked quietly, uncertain if those thoughts should have been shared in the first place - but it caught her attention. She stopped, frozen in her tracks, and whether or not it was a good idea to bring it up, it needed to be answered. It was something I wanted to be confirmed for once, to understand if her doubt in me started way before we reunited, before she was taken away. I made a promise to her, a promise I couldn't keep, and for that she suffered. Which was why I had to know, I needed to know, to hear her say it out loud. Did she blame me for that night? Did she hate me for it? All this time. . .

Had she ever forgiven me?

"That's why you're so mad, right? At everyone, because we couldn't save you on time. . ."

"This isn't about me." She looked back at me, refusing to answer properly and in all giving herself away. If she couldn't say no, if she couldn't deny it right there, it meant that I was right. It meant that she didn't want to share how she truly felt about it. She didn't want me to hear it, because it was true. She did hate us, she did blame us, because we didn't give her the same help those children had gotten instead. They got saved, they were lucky, and to her it meant that she would never be - _lucky._ That'd she'd always be caught in this web of misfortune I so desperately wanted to free her from, because she deserved it. She deserved more, better, because she was worthy, perfect, but she couldn't see that. All because she had been caught in bad situations by being in the wrong place at the wrong time. She just didn't feel. . .

 _Lucky_.

"It's always been about you, Rose. . ." I moved in quietly, reaching slowly for the hand trembling by her leg.

"That's-"

"I was so close to crossing that line." I cut her off, slipping my fingers through hers to hold the hand shaking in mine, "I wanted to slaughter that woman _so_ badly when I got there, and I was ready to _kill_ the man I found there if the titans hadn't stopped me."

"Wally. . ." She lowered her head, exhaling shuddering breaths as she said my name out loud.

"I know why you're mad and I get why you hate us. . ." I leaned forward, lifting her chin to meet the eyes avoiding mine due to tears she tried to hide, "I know it's my fault, but I swear if I could go back and save you from _all_ of that I would. . ." She stared at me, skeptical in silence, making me far more anxious as she continued battling against her doubts and distrust toward me.

It was moments like these that I wished my feelings would reach her the way they were supposed to. Moments where I'd pray she'd be capable of seeing right through me, inside me, in order to understand it all. To understand that I wasn't here to harm her, that all I wanted was for her to smile like she had done moments ago. I wanted her to feel happy, worthy, precious, and lucky - because I cherished her. I wanted to erase the uneasiness, the troubled thoughts, just as quickly as she was able to do with me whenever we were together. I just wanted her to gain as much as I did from all of this, I wanted her to understand, even if I couldn't say it out loud, that this was real. . .

That my love for her was _real_.

Then, my ringtone hummed in my pocket. A tune that sung only when my Aunt needed to call. And after my eyes had caught the time on the clock in the corner, I knew I had to answer. If I wanted to spend another day with her, I had to keep my own guardians off my back. So, ending the silence, and the conversation all together, I reached for the device and brought it up to my ear to answer.

"Hey, Aunt I."

"Wally, where are you?" My aunt asked, her voice shaking through the other end.

"I'm with a friend, why? What's going on?"

"I-I'm at the hospital. . ." She stuttered, "There was an explosion. . . barry won't wake up. . ."

"I'm on my way. . ." I hung up, not wanting to waste anymore time conversing over a matter I needed to hear in person.

"What's going on?" Rose asked, stepping over to listen to the information I'd been given.

"My uncle's hurt. . ." I whispered, my head still spinning as I tried to keep calm about the situation for now, "I need to head home."

"Okay. . ." She nodded, frantically looking around the streets through the window in the room, "But I don't think the bus comes for another -"

"Sorry." I pulled her over, scooping her feet off the floor to carry her in my arms, "We're gonna have to take a short cut." There wasn't time to argue or wait, and fortunately she was able to force herself to go along without a second thought. Even though I could feel her shaking in my embrace the entire time she remained in my arms.

If there was anything she truly hated, it was being forced into something she had no say in. She despised that and she made me understand that, but she didn't fight against me. She hated it, but she remained silent for my sake. That was compromising, that was us working together, and as much as it hurt to be the cause of her shaking, or responsible for her fear, she still forced herself to work with me. All because she wanted it, she wanted to trust in this, in what we had. That was progress, that meant we were getting somewhere, and I could feel that soon enough it'd get easier. Maybe not today, or even a year from now, but some day she wouldn't feel forced. There'd be no pressure, no limit to our feelings, because one day we'd be able to trust in one another without needing to question it. That was my goal, what I was aiming for, and I wouldn't stop until she was onboard too, because when it came to _her_ there was no giving up. Even if that meant sacrifice and moments of uneasiness. I wouldn't rest until we reached that final stage. I wouldn't quit, I wouldn't stop, because no matter what happened, no matter what awaited us, there was no way. . .

 **That I would ever give her up.**


	5. Chapter 4: Just For Today

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 ** _Sequel to: The Story You Never Knew_**

 **In Love For A Day**

 _ **(Jordan Pruitt)**_

 _ **It was magical, beautiful**_  
 _ **I didn't know how it all began**_  
 _ **One day, 24 hours**_  
 _ **It didn't turn out how I planned**_

 _ **Cause I did not expect to**_  
 _ **Feel the way, the way I do**_  
 _ **From a single day**_  
 _ **And both of us we knew we could not stay**_  
 _ **You had yours, I had mine, separate lives**_  
 _ **But at least we have the night. . .**_

* * *

 **Chapter 4: Just For Today**

 **Jinx**

A dull white room. Blue chairs bound to the ground linking to more in a straight line. People crying, pacing, and shaking in waiting for the news. This was the worst place to hang in, because this. . .

This was the waiting room.

Our date had already been ruined enough, but to think we'd have to end it worrying about the safety of his uncle. It was the worst kind of feeling, never knowing, left with just your thoughts. Nothing was guaranteed. But it felt as if the universe was just trying to throw in another sign that we were never meant to be. A message stating that if we continued on this way, not only would we get hurt but so would our loved ones.

It was all overwhelming. Everything was getting to me, making me doubt everything, making me doubt _him_ and all that he was. . . and I hated that. I hated standing with one hand on this relationship and another on the door, because I couldn't help but question him. I couldn't help but question my trust in him - in us. Not when our positions were so clearly obvious, not when I knew he was still an enemy, because I didn't want to hurt him. I didn't want to ruin this but, if I had to. . .

I knew that I would.

"Is this seat taken?" A familiar voice asked, tapping my shoulder to retrieve me from my thoughts. It was her, the woman I had dared to harm in her own home. The kind stranger that was so dear to the redhead off in a different room. . .

It was Iris.

"N-No, it's free. . ." I stuttered, waving my hand over the seat beside me for her to take.

"Coffee?" She offered, sitting next to me with an extra cup in her hand.

"Thank you." I nodded, taking it to hold onto for the time being.

"I had no idea the two of you would be out together today." She began, taking a sip of coffee first, "I feel just _awful_ spoiling your day with all of this. . ."

"Actually, we were already wrapping things up when Wally got the call. . ." I assured her, circling my finger around the lid of the cup in my hand, "Is your husband going to be okay?"

"Well, he was knocked down pretty bad, but he'll live if that's what you're wondering." She smiled, relieving all my worries for the boy who had been waiting in his uncles room all this time.

"That's good." I exhaled deeply, placing a hand over my heart in content, "Wally seemed really worried before."

"Oh, I hope he wasn't too worried." She spoke in concern for her nephew, eyes searching down the hall to look for him.

"Listen, about before. . ." I began, hesitant in bringing up a matter she herself seemed to be ignoring. But it was troubling, not knowing how she truly felt in my presence. After all, I was close enough to end her life all together. To think that her own flesh and blood was wandering around with a criminal like myself, who dared to even harm her, must have irritated her greatly. But I was scared. I was scared to finish that sentence, scared to bring it up, even though I had just tried. . . I was still scared.

"I'm not mad." The woman smiled, almost as bright as her nephew himself. Those words like music to my ears, putting my thoughts and heart at ease in hearing her say that. Even if it was a lie, it still meant a lot to me. . .

"Really? Even though I tried to-"

"Kill me? Well, believe it or not I've survived worse." She laughed to herself, placing her cup down by her feet, "And honestly, I don't see much of a killer in you."

"What do you mean?" I squinted, confused by her statement when there was no doubt she knew who I was, "I'm a criminal, a theif-"

"Maybe." She nodded, facing straight ahead, "I know your history and I've seen you on TV before, but murder isn't something that can be found on your record now, is it?"

"You don't think I'm capable of-"

"No, I think you're very capable of it. We all are. But I knew you wouldn't kill me." She grinned, confident enough to back up her opinion of me. As if she knew something I myself had no clue about, but it was familiar. It was the same attitude West carried around on campus, the same attitude that had him trying to break all barriers between us, the same attitude that had him determined to learn more about me. . .

Now I knew where it came from.

"How?" I asked.

"Because a killer kills on instinct. You were shaking. In fact, you seemed more scared than murderous in that moment." Her theory was interesting. I wasn't sure if it were true, but it was interesting. It had never been something I really thought about. Whether or not a murderer truly acted on instinct, something they couldn't control, because it was part of who they were. If that were true, if I couldn't do it as easily as breathing, then maybe. . .

There was hope for me.

"I see. . ." I whispered, mostly to myself, but I could tell she heard it. Just by the eyes I could feel stuck on me, they belonged to her. However, I was surprised to feel her touch as she reached out to take my hand.

"It's all in the past now. In fact, I'm actually very grateful to you."

"Grateful? For what?" I asked, pulling my hand out of hers.

"For making him smile." She nodded, staring down the hall with her hands placed over her lap, "I was worried that he'd never change, but he seems to truly care about you. You're precious to him." She finished speaking, staring at something in the distance. I wasn't sure what to make of her words, and I wanted to say something. I wanted to get a better explanation as to what she meant. But then that something in the distance came rushing over, voice dull and worn out as he stood behind me to speak.

"The doctor wants to see you." West informed the woman beside me, her eyes and shoulders dropping as she sunk into her chair.

"Oh, great. More paper work." She groaned, rubbing her forehead before she pushed herself back up on her feet. "Alright, you two should probably head on home now and rest." She sighed, walking over to Wally as I stood up to leave.

"Call me if you need anything." He told the woman who patted his shoulder and smiled before leaving. He was exhausted, it was already so late, and there was still school work waiting for both of us to complete. But before we headed out we stopped to listen to the woman who called out for me.

"Oh, Rose." She waved, still smiling like the redhead who stood by me with an irritated expression, "You're always welcomed to come over anytime. Please, don't be a stranger."

"Thank you. . ." That was all I managed to say. The truth being, I wanted her to like me. I wanted her to acknowledge me. So, hearing her speak such kind words to me truly meant more than either of them would ever know.

"Sorry for making you wait long." He apologized, rubbing the back of his neck as the two of us headed for the exit.

"It's fine. Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I think they got everything handled here." He nodded, taking a quick glance back at the hall his aunt had wandered into.

"You seemed pretty scared before."

"My Aunt tends to over exaggerate things on the phone." He groaned, his irritation now clear to me due to his unnecessary worry for the man in a hospital bed, "I'm just glad they're both safe now."

"You really care about them don't you?" I asked, eyes watching him as that exhausted frown morphed into a smile with the thought of his Aunt and Uncle peering through his head.

"Yeah. They're my family." He nodded, his hands sliding into his pockets as we walked on.

"Must be nice." I nodded, the idea of them all together making me smile. It was sweet, a family like that _actually_ existing. It wasn't perfect, but it was like a fantasy in it's own way. The thought of coming home to something like that. . .

Felt almost like a dream.

"Hey. . ." The redhead suddenly stopped in his tracks, making me do the same as I snapped out of thought to look back at him.

"What's wrong?" I asked, a pinch of concern thrown into the back of my head as he watched me from where he stood.

"Nothing, I just. . ." He paused, his feet slowly making their way over to me, "Look, I get why you can't leave your team behind. They're your family too and you want to help them but-"

"But what?" I cut him off, eyes focused on him in my demands of knowing as to what he felt the need to discuss by bringing the others up.

"But they're not your only family anymore, right?" He shrugged, looking down at me as I gazed up at him, puzzled by his question, " _Me._ I care about you, I want to protect you, and not because you're my girlfriend or my friend, but because I'm always going to be connected to you in someway. . ." He tried to explain and I understood what he was trying to get at. This was more than my team, than my friends, this was about the bond I held with each of them, and if the bond between me and the redhead could _ever_ be as strong. . .

"Wally, it's not the same."

"Why not?" He asked, his voice hurt by my refusing to acknowledge him as anything more than he already was, "Rose, they aren't related to you in anyway. You only see them as family because you're always going to share a past that'll keep you all linked together. But what about me? What about us? Our past? Aren't we family?"

"I don't know. . ." I shrugged, reviewing his logic in my head knowing very well it made sense. We did share a past, we would always be linked together no matter what the future held for us. Yet, it was different between us. . . because I couldn't trust him just yet.

"Jinx. . ." He whispered my name, my true name, the identity that was of who I had been reborn as. And as he did, as he watched me hard with eyes cold and serious, my own grew wide in shock, "No matter what happens, I'm always going to have your back. That's what family does. Are you telling me that you don't feel the same way?" His question put me in a difficult position, yet I didn't hesitate. If I did then I'd be lying to myself, because at this point I had only one answer. . .

"I do. . ." I admitted, placing a hand on his chest to partially ease his troubled heart, "But I can't change anything now."

"This isn't you." He said as he took and gently squeezed the hand I had on him, "This isn't what you want."

"You don't know what I want, West." I tried to laugh, stepping back to avoid discussing anything further. . . until he said it.

"Freedom." He spoke up, amazing me once again as if he were capable of reading into my mind, "You can have that here. You can have a real future here, _Rose_. You can graduate from high school, go to college, and be normal if you just -"

"I knew this would happen." I shook my head, pulling away to force myself in realizing the facts. This couldn't progress, he couldn't keep filling my head with all these dreams and fantasies. If he did, then it'd only make it harder to focus on my true goal. If he did, then it'd be impossible to return to reality at some point. . . "We just can't work, you and I. At the end of the day our positions on the field are too different."

"They don't have to be." He stepped over, reaching to take my hand in his again. The warmth he emitted through touch filled me with great hope. Hope for a better future, a better tomorrow. This was what I truly wanted, freedom - with him. A world where the two of us could exist safely without any doubts. . .

Then she came along.

"Wally?" The annoyingly familiar voice of my sister came through.

"Linda?" He stepped forward, a smile forming by simply seeing her face, "What are you doing here?"

"My mom had to make a late appointment. . ." She explained, her eyes slowly travelling from him to me, "Rose, you're here?"

"Don't worry I was just leaving." I said dully, refusing to show any emotion toward the girl I had been trying to cut out of my life. But as I stepped away to head for the exit, she refused to let me go again, quickly rushing to block me from leaving.

"Well-" She began, trying to smile in hopes of breaking the tension between us, "Since you're here maybe we could go out and have a-"

"I told you before," I paused, staring straight ahead before meeting her eyes, "I want nothing to do with you."

"C'mon Rose, ease up a little." Wally nudged, standing between us to pull himself into the conversation.

"This has nothing to do with you." I said shortly, annoyed by the redhead's need to always swoop in and save those in situations he played no part in.

"It's fine." She waved her hands, shaking her head at the boy watching her, "I understand and respect your decision-"

"Then leave." I stared, stern and cold in my speaking to her, "Leave this city and stay out of my life." It wasn't a threat, and I wasn't trying to make her feel as if she'd ever be harmed at my hands, but the redhead didn't see it that way. He didn't understand the conflict between us, how much I hated her even though I never placed my blame toward her at all. . .

He just couldn't understand.

"Okay, stop." He grabbed my arm and pulled me away from the other girl, "You don't have to speak to her that way. She's only trying to-"

"I said stay out of this!" I cried out, shoving him off as he stared at me just as aggravated as I was in that moment, "If you want to comfort her yourself then fine, but I'm done getting involved." I said, pushing past them to leave for the exit they stood in the way of.

"Wait, please!" Linda pleaded, taking my arm tightly in her hand only to be pushed away and shoved to the ground.

"Don't ever touch me again." I threatened, this time serious in my warning to her.

"You're being ridiculous!" He yelled, bending over to help the other girl back up on her feet. Of course he would, he was the hero. He was meant to help those fortunate enough to escape the life of crime. I, myself, couldn't blame either of them for that. I was the bad guy, that was the role I was forced to play for trying to keep myself alive. I was never meant to live, I was never meant to survive, and because I did I was cursed. . .

That's why he could never understand.

I walked first, my feet speeding up only until I was outside. It was cold, my breath visible through white puffs in the air, and I was alone again. This was the sign I had tried to avoid. The message the universe kept wanting me to see. I wasn't meant to live, I wasn't meant to stay here, I was the mistake, the villain, because I was alone. And if you were alone, no one would ever try to understand you. That's what villain's were after all, people, heroes even, who had been misunderstood. It didn't matter how many good acts we tried to make in the past, we were never meant to live, so by trying to survive, we were doomed to live down our lives in misery. . .

That was our fate.

"Rose!" I could hear him screaming from the door, his voice nearing as I tried escaping him the faster I ran. But, of course, there was no outrunning the fastest kid alive. And before I realized it, there he was, pulling on my arm to keep me from trying to leave again.

"Hey!" He shook me, spinning me around to force our eyes to meet, "What were you trying to prove by doing that? You know it was wrong to treat her that w-"

"Why are you always defending her?" I screamed, yanking my arm away from him to step back, "It's her fault I'm like this you know? If we had switched places back then, she would have been the one in pain - not me. She would have been the monster. . ." I shared my thoughts out loud, realizing just how selfish I sounded hearing it with my own ears. My eyes focused on my two trembling hands, the hands that had caused so much damage and pain to those who stood against me. . .

"And that's what you want?" He asked, making me feel even worse, "Do you honestly wish she would have taken your place instead?"

"No!" I screamed, hands blocking my ears to tune his voice out, "But it's not fair! She has everything and she still wants _more_. It's easy for her to be happy with the idea of me, but I'm not the same girl anymore. . ." I shook my head, memories flashing of the older sister I once admired. The sister I had such strong faith in, my hero, the one I depended on. The idea of anyone causing harm to her broke me, the thought of her going through the same process tore me to shreds, but this hurt more. It hurt that he couldn't understand, that he could so easily stand beside her and choose to defend her decisions over mine. It wasn't fair, it wasn't right, and I was sick of always being forgotten. I was sick of never maintaining a higher status, never being good enough, I was tired. . . of never being first.

"Rose, she isn't trying to change you." He reached for my hands, slowly removing them to hold in his, "She just wants a relationship with-"

"Well I can't give her that!" I shouted, lowering my eyes to turn my head away, "And I'm tired of always having to go against everyone to prove that. . ." My voice cracked. My body shaking from the cold and the pain I harbored in my chest. It hurt to think about, it was difficult to talk about without crying, and I hated crying around him. I felt weak, pathetic, but I couldn't help it because when I was with him. . .

Everything always spilled out.

"Rose, I'm not fighting against you -"

"Then prove it." I cut him off, sliding my hands out of his to wipe the tears in my eyes, "Stop trying to change me. Stop siding with everyone else and choose me. . . the way I am now."

"I. . ." He stopped, hesitating with his mouth open as he struggled to find his words. He couldn't do it, he couldn't be with me when it meant going against all he believed in. I wasn't going to force him either. I wasn't going to turn him into something that he wasn't, because he was a hero. He was a good guy, an idiot, but a good person. He cared about people, he liked saving others, and I didn't want him to lose that side to him. I didn't want him to feel he had to sacrifice himself for me, because I wasn't going to do the same for him. It just meant, that what we had couldn't be real. . .

Not in this life.

"I knew it." I whispered, turning away to leave on my own. I was ready to go home, ready to cry into my bed and forget that all of this had ever happened. Even if it was just for a day, I needed to forget about it. I needed to forget him - us, because what we had couldn't work unless we forced it to. And if we did that then we'd only end up hurting one another in the future.

Still, he took me by surprise once again. He knew this was trouble, he knew we'd be faced with more challenges if he didn't let me go, if he couldn't let me walk away now. Yet, he raced after me. He caught me from escaping, reeling me in by swooping down to yank me forward. Our lips crashing against one another, warmth exchanged on a cold Autumn night. The both of us trying hard to express our feelings for each other, hoping they'd reach our hearts through that one simple kiss. All out of weakness and fear, the fear of saying goodbye, the fear of moving on, the fear of letting go and giving up, because he was my weakness. He was everything to me in that moment, and I tried so desperately to show him that right there. . .

"I choose this, okay?" He whispered, eyes shut as he placed his forehead over mine. "I choose us."

"Don't toy with me, West." I breathed, staring back at deep blue eyes closely watching me.

"I'm not." He said, pulling back to kiss my forehead only to bring me forward and into his embrace. "I'm telling you that I'll always be on your side. From here on out it's just us against everyone else. . ." His arms were shaking, and I was unable to tell if it was due to the cold or for my own reckless behavior in troubling him again, but I didn't say anything, ignoring my own guilt as he whispered into my ear and said, "You don't have to fight alone anymore."

"Promise?" I asked, wrapping my arms around the boy to ease his trembling with my own warmth and reassurance.

"I promise." I felt him nod, my own heart racing and warming me up from the inside.

I was sure this wouldn't last, thinking realistically, the odds were against us. But, with the mind I once carried as a child, this felt true. It felt real, innocent even, and it made me fantasize of a life that could be. A life where we could always be like this. And even if it did not last, even if it was all doomed to come crashing down, I'd have no regrets - because I wanted this. I wanted this day, even if it could only be just for a day, I wanted him. I wanted this to last for as long as it could. Just until our time was up. And as he pulled me in to kiss him again, I knew this would be it because. . .

 **There was no going back.**


	6. Chapter 5: Never Enough

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 ** _Sequel to: The Story You Never Knew_**

 **Was I The Only One**

 _ **(Jordin Sparks)**_

 _ **And every little kiss,**_  
 _ **From your tender lips,**_  
 _ **Couldn't of been a lie.**_  
 _ **I fell hard over head,**_  
 _ **Without a safty net,**_  
 _ **And I don't understand this goodbye.**_

 _ **Was I the only one who fell in love?**_  
 _ **There never really was the two of us.**_  
 _ **And maybe my all just wasn't good enough.**_  
 _ **Was I the only one, only one, in love?**_

* * *

 **Chapter 5: Never Enough**

 **Kid flash**

Drops of water splashed quietly. Each falling to the rhythm of the clock. My reflection appearing far less nervous than how I felt on the inside. How could I not be nervous? How could I not feel anxious when she was right in the other room? She was here, in my house, not as a friend this time or a lab partner. She was here as my guest, as my girlfriend, and I couldn't even touch her. . .

Not in the way I wanted to at least.

And it was tough, it was hard to hold back whenever she was around. It was even harder knowing that we were alone. We were able to do whatever we wanted, but we couldn't because. . . she wasn't ready yet. She might not ever be, not really anyway - and that frustrated me. But I wouldn't forced myself on her, I'd be patient because she was worth it. I'd wait for her. I'd wait forever if I had to. If it meant not having to repeat what happened the last time she was here, if it meant not having to see that frightened look on her face, or hear her scream that way again. . . then I'd wait. I had to, because I couldn't live with myself if I saw her look at me like that. I couldn't forgive myself if I saw her cry like she did before. . .

But it was hard to restrain myself. It was hard not wanting to take her, to claim all of her, and not lose control. The last time was proof enough. I only forced myself on her to test my theory, to see if there had been more to her past than I had suspected, but even then I still got lost in the moment. Anyone would if they were with her. Which was why I had to stay sharp, calm, and alert if I didn't want to mess it up. If I did, if I scared her again, if I heard her scream like before, then I knew I'd regret it. . .

Because I didn't _want_ to hurt her.

"There's a hole in your wall." I heard her mutter from the corner of the room after I entered. She stood facing a dresser, her back kept toward me as I shut the door behind. Somehow managing to still amaze me with her skills in noticing my presence without even needing to look at me.

"Yeah, I've been meaning to get it fixed for a while."

"You sure your Aunt and Uncle won't mind me crashing here?" She asked, facing me to receive an answer.

"Not like you can go walking back to the city on foot." I laughed, moving toward her to reach for the dresser, "They'll understand." I assured her, pulling open one of the drawers behind her. There I found it, the small piece of jewelry I kept safe for a moment like this. A moment where I could return it to her again, because in all honesty, it no longer belonged to me. . .

"You still have that?" She eyed the pendant in my hand, watching as it dangled in front of her slowly.

"Of course, it was my mothers." I reminded her, watching her face drop as I pushed the drawer back in.

"Right. . ." She nodded, trying to step back only to be gently pulled back.

"But now it's yours." I said shortly, moving behind her to place the thin piece of jewelry around her neck.

"West I don't think-"

"I still have to keep my promise remember?" I reminded her, clasping the necklace to seal an old forgotten vow, "You have to hold onto it until I can make you happy." I smiled, my arms wrapping themselves around her tiny frame. She wouldn't look at me, she didn't say anything, she just let me hold her. She let herself take part in enjoying the moment in silence. It was nice, it was refreshing, simply holding her like this, and if I could spend the rest of my life doing just that. . .

I'd die a happy man.

"Isn't this from the arcade?" She asked, pulling away to reach for the card placed on top of the dresser beside us.

"Oh yeah. I must have forgotten to throw it out." I tried reaching for it, feeling somewhat nervous in her seeing it. It was an odd feeling, and it was just a dumb card, yet I panicked. Almost as if, there was more to the printed fortune I had received that day. . .

" _In little time you will come to know your soul mate and the love of your life, but will be forced to choose between the two. . ._ What a weird fortune." She mocked, pulling the card away with my every attempt in swiping it out of her hand..

"Yeah it is pretty stupid." I agreed, falling back to lay on my bed in defeat.

"Which would you choose?" She asked.

"What do you mean?" I asked, glancing back at her as she made her way to sit beside me.

"Your soul mate or the love of your life?" She shrugged, waiting for an answer I had never given much thought into.

If I really thought about it, I wasn't sure if the whole soul mates concept were true or not. But if they were, if there really was someone who'd always be connected to me in someway, then they could be anything. They could be a brother, a sister, a friend, an aunt - anyone. Looking at it like that, it was easy to decide. And as I stared into deep brown eyes, I knew my answer wouldn't need to be thought over too much. My soul mate would always be there, but love. . .

love was never guaranteed.

 ** _"You."_**

She was blushing. Her face flushing a deep red as she tried to hide it by turning away. It was hilarious, managing to stir up her feelings like that with simple words, and I couldn't help but laugh. Not that I was mocking her, I just enjoyed seeing each hidden side to her surface from time to time. The smiling jinx, the sad jinx, the angry jinx, the blushing jinx. . .

I loved them all.

"That wasn't an option." She cleared her throat, flicking the card at me to stand up on her own.

"But it's my only answer." I grinned, taking her hand and bringing her back down to stare into hazel eyes again, "I'm not sure if I believe in the whole soul mates thing, but if you're making me choose then I'd _always_ pick you."

And it was true. I didn't care if she was my soul mate, or if her soul was truly connected to someone else, just as long as she was next to me. Just as long as she chose me. Then, I'd be satisfied. She was all I wanted, all I'd ever want, and as we laid there together I knew if I had to choose between her and someone else there'd be no doubt. . .

I'd pick her every time.

"How cheesy." She mumbled, the blush on her face deepening as she tried ignoring my stare.

"Aw, you're blushing." I pinched her cheeks, laughing as she tried to smack me away in embarrassment.

"Am not!" She yelled, pushing herself away to get back up.

"What? Did my words get your heart racing?" I teased, hiding my fear as she shot an angry glare after standing up alone. But, I couldn't hide the pain when she decided to move in and kick my leg instead.

"Don't make me kill you, West." She threatened, watching as I sat holding my bruised leg.

"Always so. . . sweet with your. . . words." I managed to say despite the throbbing pain I tried to sooth by rubbing gently.

"Whatever." She rolled her eyes, storming for the door as I hurriedly jumped up to go after her.

"C'mon, I was just kidding." I reached for her arm, hoping I had not upset her too much as she fought against my hold.

"I don't ca- Ah!" She yelped, stumbling backwards after pulling away too quickly. I tried to catch her, holding her in my arms to keep her standing, but our feet got mixed in with each other, making us trip and fall over wooden floors.

My hand was placed on the back of her head to protect her from hitting the ground too hard. It worked enough seeing that she seemed okay, but my hand would probably feel swollen somewhere in the next hour. Still, she was safe. I kept her safe, my arm wrapped around her waist as I laid over her on the floor. But it wasn't until she opened her eyes that we realized the position we were in. . .

Her shirt pulled slightly back in revealing her pale stomach, her chest only inches away from my hand - and we were alone. I tried not to stare, not to focus on the purple strap linked to her bra, not to pay too much attention to the exposed skin she always kept hidden with long sleeved tops and such. But her eyes, her lips, they were impossible to avoid. And as she remained silent, as she kept still underneath me, I couldn't help but be drawn into her.

I caressed the side of her face softly, feeling her flinch slightly in response, but I still moved in. I leaned forward, slowly, carefully, and placed my lips over hers. I didn't want it to stop there, I didn't want it to end with just kissing, not with lips like hers - entrancing and ever so enchanting. Like a drug I was addicted, addicted to her, and I couldn't stop in craving even more.

I kept my hand on her head, letting it roam through her hair, as the other went sliding up her leg. She didn't seem to resist, she held onto me, kissing me back just as passionately. I was losing it, patience was driving me insane as I nipped on her bottom lip to gain access. I explored her mouth once given permission to enter, my body pressing against hers in the heat of the moment. I wanted more, I needed more, but not just from anyone - from her. It had to be her, I had to have her, I had to make her mine. I wanted so desperately to forever leave my mark on her body, in her mind, in her memory, and in that moment that was what I was determined to do. But as I slid my hand up her shirt, ready to take that final step. . .

She stopped us.

She pulled away, gasping, and pushing me back. She didn't say anything, she didn't scream or shove me off, she didn't even try moving away. But I knew she wasn't ready. I knew it wasn't time yet, and if I took advantage of this moment, if I tried convincing her to continue then I'd feel no better than the others. I'd be just as a low - scum forever in her eyes. And I didn't want to pressure her. I didn't want to be selfish and force myself when it was so clear now wasn't the time. But we'd get there, one day. . .

I just needed to wait.

"You should probably get some rest." I smiled, ruffling her hair before pushing back to stand up, "I'm gonna crash downstairs." I decided before making my way to the door.

"Y-You're not gonna stay with me?" She suddenly reached for my hand, stopping me from leaving the room all together.

"I think it's better if I sleep on the couch then the floor this time." I laughed, referring to our last sleepover and the major back pain it caused, "But I'll be right downstairs if you-"

"Don't. . ." She got up, pulling on my shirt, "Please just stay. . ." She was shaking this time, head bent so that I could not read her eyes. I wasn't sure what she was thinking, especially when she was normally so guarded in situations like these. But I understood my own thoughts, and I knew seeing her that way, looking vulnerable in front of me, made me want to take her again. I couldn't fight it, I couldn't shake the urges when we were together like this, and I pulled her into my arms as those urges grew even stronger. I held her tightly, squeezing her gently, knowing any second I could snap as the bed called for me to lay her in. . . but I pulled away. I fought against my desires and kept her at a safe distance, my eyes turning in any direction so that I wouldn't need to look at her. Not now, not when I was feeling this weak. . .

"Rose, please. . ." I pleaded, clenching my fists, "I'm a guy too, ya know? I can't keep my cool under these conditions. . ."

"But last time you-"

"Last time I almost lost control." I confessed, scared to meet her eyes in that moment, "The last time you were here I nearly forced myself on you. I don't wanna do that again, I don't want to scare you away, but. . . I'm really no different than any other guy." My tongue burned in hearing me admit it out loud. I knew she'd probably be disgusted, probably smack me across the head for having such vulgar thoughts of her, even I knew how gross it sounded out loud. But at the end of the day, I wasn't all that different from them. I wanted everything she had to offer, all that she was, the only thing that separated me from them was that I wasn't willing to take her by force. I couldn't stand to see her cry, to hurt her that way. . .

But I was still a _guy_.

"You want to hurt me?" She asked in a whisper, making my head shoot up to view the hurt expression she had on her face.

"No!" I said loudly, holding her arms as I tried to better explain myself, "I just want _you_. _All_ of you, but I know that I can't have that yet, and I don't want to pressure you into anything like-"

"Then don't." She said dully, her voice toneless and cold. Eyes watching me like an object, not a person, not as me, because this wasn't her. She wasn't speaking honestly, she wasn't speaking to me, she was speaking to _them_ because. . . she was trying to shut herself off again. All feelings, all thoughts, all that she was just to please me. . . and I _hated_ that. "Don't hold back. Do whatever you want with me."

"Rose I'm not gonna-" my refusal was ignored as she pulled me down to kiss me. It was wrong, it wasn't real, no matter how hard she tried to deepen the kiss. She tried to recreate the passion we normally held for each other by wrapping her arms around my neck to kiss me _hard_. I tried to go along with it, kissing her back, mimicking her movements. . . but it was wrong. She was forcing herself, her hand shakily travelling under my shirt as the other fumbled with my belt. . .

That's when it needed to end.

"Stop!" I pushed her away firmly, hands on her shoulders to keep her back, "Just stop. . ."

"You can't, can you?" Her voice shuddered softly, body shaking, as I forced myself to look at her. I stared at pained eyes and a false smile she put on in front of me, faking her way through the whole thing - and it hurt. It hurt to see her that way, to see her pretending, but it hurt even more hearing her speak up to ask. . .

 **"I disgust you, don't I?"**

"That's not it!" I yelled, panicking as she grew further and further away from me. It hurt to hear her even ask such a thing, to assume something like that for even a second when all I was trying to do was protect her.

"Then why can you sleep with every other girl on campus but me?" She asked, the fire in her eyes flaring as she smacked my hands off of her.

"Because you actually mean something to me!" I screamed, watching angry eyes fade into ones of shock and disbelief. I didn't want to argue, I didn't want to fight with her, the whole reason I tried leaving the room was to avoid that. I just wanted her to feel safe, secure, and as I pulled her in to wrap my arms around her neck I wanted her to know that.

I buried my face in her shoulder, unable to fight the tears in my eyes from escaping. I just couldn't help it, I couldn't help but feel hurt whenever she was upset. I couldn't help but want to carry her pain for her, to want to help her get better, because it was always hard for her. It was hard for her to trust, to express how she felt, and I just wanted her to know that I was always here to listen. Always ready to share her pain, because I'd _always_ be here for her. . .

"I just don't wanna hear you scream like that again. . ." I whispered to her, remembering the awful shrieks that pierced my ears when I had last tried to force myself on her. I didn't want to hear it again, I didn't want to think about it, because she didn't realize just how painful it was for me. . . "Admit it, you're scared too." Her arms held onto me, gripping onto my shirt as her sobs were finally released. She was back, she was being honest with her feelings, and as we dropped to the ground in tears, as she cried into my chest, I knew how she felt; afraid.

And that was the last thing I wanted her to feel with me. I didn't want her to do anything she didn't want to do, not if it upset her, not if she was only trying to satisfy me. She needed to understand that I was here for her, I was hurting along with her, so she didn't need to bare that pain alone anymore. She didn't need to do anything, say anything, but be honest with herself. She needed to know that she could always lean on me, trust in me, because that would be the solution to everything. . .

Then something rang.

Her communicator beeped in her bag, and like an obedient pet, she pulled away and wiped those tears to answer. She cleared her voice and forced herself to pick up the device. As if this _family_ she claimed _cared_ for her were more important than her own feelings, more important than her happiness. But it was clear they were ruining her, it was obvious it was damaging her mentally, and I hated seeing her like that. I hated watching her behave like an animal, one ready to obey and do as instructed. Even as their leader, they had such a tight leash on her, and if she didn't have their approval it mean the end in her eyes. She was insane, poisoned by them due to their past, and she wouldn't break free from their hold on her. . .

Because she was a fool.

"What is it?" She asked, voice raspy, though her teammate didn't seem to notice.

"They called." Someone said.

"Who?"

"Who else." Her expression changed, as if hit by a realization of some sort. And I had a bad feeling I knew as to whom the two were talking about, "All you have to do is come home and give them an answer." The boy on the device said, most likely the one eyed friend she was _so_ obsessed with. But she was doubting herself, eyes watching me for a moment before she could even answer the other.

"I'm on my way." She whispered, hanging up to toss the device into her bag.

"Jinx, don't do this." I begged, praying she'd listen and stay with me as we both got back up on our feet. "You can't join them, okay? You're better than this!"

"Wally you don't get it." She shook her head, pulling the straps of her bag over her shoulder, "I'm not like you. I'm _never_ gonna be normal. My teammates _need_ me."

"It's not your job to babysit them!" I shouted, flailing my arms as she tried to cut past me to leave, "You may be good at pretending to be an adult, but you're not! You can still back out-"

"You make it sound like I have a choice!" She glared at me with her hand on the knob.

"You do!" I stepped forward, placing a hand on the one she had on the door, "I chose you, rose. Why can't you choose me?"

There was a heavy silence between us as she opened her mouth to say something. She struggled to find an answer to my question, knowing very well there could only be one. The fact that she couldn't say it, the fact that she couldn't decide, made it clear as to what side she wanted to stand on. She wanted to be with them, more than me, she wanted to join their side. Whatever reason it was, her mother, her past, her teammates, revenge, they all sounded like excuses at this point. Honestly, she just seemed lost. She seemed scared to do something on her own, to follow her own happiness in fear that it would fail, and so she chose them. She chose to follow them and do what they wanted because. . .

They were her safety net.

"I'm sorry. . ." She whispered her final words, not answering my question and choosing to leave with just that.

Everything seemed pointless now. All my efforts, all my hard work, felt pointless when nothing had changed between us. She may have been with me physically, but her heart was never there. It was never here with us, not that it was a lie, not that she didn't care, it just could never be mine. My love for her was strong, but it might have always been one sided. All this time, it might have just been me who felt like this. Alone in a relationship that shouldn't have ever existed in the first place. And as I dropped to the ground to bury my face in my hands, I couldn't stop wondering what it was I had failed to see, what I missed, where I had gone wrong, and why. . .

 **"Why couldn't I be enough. . .?"**


	7. Chapter 6: A Disease Called Love

**Disclaimer: Teen Titans © DC**

 **Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)**

 **"Can't Forget You"**

 _ **(My Darkest Days)**_

 _ **Whoever said this pain, would ever go away**_  
 _ **Didn't know what it meant to, be here without you**_  
 _ **Is everything you see, reminding you of me?**_  
 _ **Does it hurt when you breathe too?**_  
 ** _'Cause it does when I do, cause it does when I do_**

 _ **When anybody says your name I wanna run away,**_  
 _ **I keep remembering I can't forget you**_  
 _ **It doesn't matter when I try it happens anyway,**_  
 _ **It's been forever and I can't forget you**_  
 _ **With every single day, it won't go away**_  
 _ **The way I feel about you**_  
 _ **And when it's said and done, you're the only one**_  
 _ **And I can't regret you, so I can't forget you**_

* * *

 **Chapter 6: A Disease Called Love**

 **Jinx**

It was dark outside. Heavy clouds blocked out all light from the sky, the stars, the moon - it was just dark. Almost like everything else in my life, this was just another sign of the path I was meant to take. A guide into darkness, the darkness that corrupted me years ago, the darkness that was my ally. This was who I was meant to be. Even if my desires were different. . .

I'd always be unlucky.

I should have accepted that years ago. I thought I had, but somewhere along the way I got mixed in with this fantasy the redhead had tried to create for me. . . for us. It was a mistake. A mistake I never should have carried out this long. I knew I'd regret it, yet I kept pushing forward alongside him. All in the process of getting too attached to the boy that I never should have grown close with. It would have been safer if I had just given him up, thrown him away, exposed him to the others. At least then it wouldn't have hurt as much. . .

 **"I chose you, Rose. Why can't you choose me?"**

I truly was a traitor. Not only had I betrayed my team in doing all of this, but I had hurt the one person who had faith in me. The only guy who felt I was more than just my past, my powers, my mistakes. . .

And I _lost_ him.

The living room was empty when I entered. The others were nowhere to be found, assuming they were all spending time in their own rooms for once. Which surprised me at the least, but I was more than fine with it. The last thing I wanted to do was talk to them, or even the brotherhood of evil at that. I just wanted to be alone for a while, I needed some time away. Unfortunately, I knew that'd be impossible. As long as I was here, part of this team, as long as I was _Jinx_ \- there'd be no escape. And as I entered my room, tossed my belongings onto my bed, there was someone there who was sure to remind me of just that. . .

"You're back."

"Gosh!" I shrieked, whipping around with a hand on my heart to face the boy standing behind me in the dark, "Seymour, don't creep up on me like that!"

"Sorry." He shrugged, not caring much for my reaction as he made his way to sit on my bed, "But you were gone for a pretty long time."

"Yeah, I was just running some errands." I lied, opening my bag to search and pull out books carrying various assignments given to me in class.

"With a friend?"

"No, alone." I said casually, our eyes never meeting as I walked over to place my school work on the desk in the corner.

"Oh. . ." I heard him mumble, listening to the bed springs squeak after he stood up to follow me, "Not even with Rudolph?"

My items nearly slipped from out of my hands after hearing him speak his name. I panicked, for a split second, but he still noticed. He caught me off guard with his question, something I shouldn't have let get to me so easily, something I should have been prepared for. But I failed. I failed in hiding the truth and now I'd been pushed into a situation that never should have resulted in the first place. I never should have lied, I never should have betrayed them, but I did. And now, I'd need to lie again. . .

 _Just_ to survive.

"W-What makes you think-" I thought first to play dumb, thinking it'd be best to play it out as some huge misunderstanding. But I still wore the ring, the ring they had tracked me with before, which meant they were most likely still doing that behind my back. So, it was pointless in hiding it at this point. My only other option. . .

 **Play The Victim.**

"You're still tracking me!?"

"Nope," He paused, stepping forward to stand in closer, "You just confirmed it yourself." He eyed me, seeing right through my lies the entire time. He caught me, I was trapped, I was stuck here and there was no way out of this. There was no way in gaining their trust back, none of them, not if they had figured it out on their own. If they knew, if they found out, then I'd be just like Terra. To them I'd always be. . .

Just another _traitor_.

"Don't worry, I haven't told the others." I heard him say, my eyes stuck facing the ground. There was no doubt he hated me, no doubt he no longer trusted me, or would ever count on me again. Yet, he was still protecting me. He was still trying to keep me safe, because he knew there'd be no coming back from this if they all found out. And that made me feel even worse, because I didn't deserve it. After all we had been through, all that I'd done. . .

I didn't deserve his kindness.

"It's not what you think. . ."

"Stop lying to me." He glared, snatching my hand to grip tightly in his hold, "I'm tired of it."

"I'm sorry. . ." I nodded, turning my head away to hide the tears I knew would shed in seeing his pained expression.

"I'll admit, I _did_ track down your location on the night of your stupid dance." He said, roughly tossing my hand away, "And it wasn't that hard to find his name on the list of those living in that house. . ."

"Seymour, I can expla-"

"When were you planning on telling us? If ever?" He asked, waiting for me to catch his eyes flaring angrily back at me.

"It's. . . complicated." I felt awful in not giving a proper answer. I could have told him about West, who he was, how we met, I could have saved myself there. But if I did, if I gave his information away that easily, than I'd be no better than any other traitor. And, in all honesty, I couldn't find it in me to hurt the redhead even more. I had already broken his heart enough. . .

He deserved better than this.

"You lied to us."

"No!" I panicked, reaching for his hands to better explain myself, "No I just, I didn't know what to do-"

"You were suppose to make a choice!" He screamed in my face, shoving my hands away before they could even touch him, "You were suppose to choose us!"

"I did! I'm here, aren't I? Please, you have to understand that-"

"You betrayed us, Jinx." His words stabbed me in the deepest part of my heart, the pain stinging the longer he stared at me with the same anger and pain in his eyes, "You chose to leave us behind."

"No. . ." I shook my head, stumbling backwards as I struggled to find my balance.

"You knew him _one_ day." He muttered, holding his finger up to my face, " _One_ day, jinx. But he wasn't there to help you escape, he wasn't their to protect you like the rest of us. . . like me."

"Seymour, please. . ." I cried, shaking terribly as I held his hand tightly in mine.

"You love him, don't you?" He asked, eyes staring at our fingers interlocked with one another, but I couldn't answer. I couldn't, because I didn't understand how I felt toward the redhead myself. But he didn't see it that way, he took my silence as a confirmation and in doing so, quickly removed his hand from mine to leave, "Of course you do. You always have."

"Seymour, wait!" I called chasing after him as he went storming out of my bedroom.

"I'm done waiting, jinx." He muttered softly, suddenly stopping to look back at me from down the hall, "But this whole thing you two have going on, whatever it is, just know that _none_ of it ever would have happened if we hadn't gotten you out of that place. _None_ of it."

"I'm sorry. . ." I whispered, quickly running to hold him from behind, "I'm so sorry. . ." My tears slipped down my cheek after I buried my face into his back. He was warm, he was always warm. Even back then, when all seemed dark, cold, and numb, he was always there. He was always protecting me, always ready to help, ready to hold me when I needed him. It didn't matter how painful it was for me, or for him, we were always ready to be there for each other. . .

Because we were a family.

"Let go." He demanded, trying to pull me off as I fought even harder to cling onto him.

"Please, don't go!" I shook my head, crying desperately as I pleaded for him to stay. This was my fault, it was always my fault, but I never wanted to hurt anyone. I never wanted to let any of them down, because I knew just how much they needed me, depended on me, looked up to me. Yet here I was, unable to satisfy their every need. . .

How pathetic.

But, just when he managed to pull my arms off, just when I thought he'd leave me there alone to cry, he surprised me. He took both wrists and slammed my body against the wall, pinning me hard so that I couldn't move or turn away. This was what he wanted, what I was prepared to give, because he needed me. He had done so much in the past, he deserved to have all of me, and that was why I didn't fight against him. . .

I let him kiss me, our lips crashing roughly against one another in the empty hallway. He gripped my cheeks hard, forcing me to give him entrance into my mouth. He wanted to deepen the kiss, he wanted to get me to understand as he pressed himself up against me on the wall. There was no point in pushing him away, no point in crying out for help, because it was _him_ \- it was _Seymour_. Even if he hurt me, damaged me, _killed_ me, it wouldn't matter. I owed him my life, I owed him everything, because if he hadn't gone back for me that day, if he hadn't carried me away. . .

I wouldn't be standing here today.

"You can't have it both way's, Rose." He whispered into my ear, breathing heavily as he kept me pinned in front of him, "There has to be a line. Which means, you have to decide who you want more. . ." He pulled back a little, trying to meet my eyes as he waited for an answer. He wanted me to pick him, to belong to him, just like all the others - just like a pet. And I wanted to, I wanted to choose him without any doubt or hesitation. . . but I couldn't. Not when the other was still in my head, not when his words still had an effect on me. . .

I just couldn't do it.

"It's Rouge!" Gizmo yelled, alarms going off in the hall to signal an incoming call.

He released me right there, the two of us panicking as we hurriedly ran into the living room to answer the transmission. The others were there, all together, waiting on me to pick it up myself. This was it, the moment that'd determine where we'd stand in this world forever, and it was all up to me. They were all depending on my answer, all their hard work due to my own passion in reaching our goals. It was all done for me. Now. . .

It was time to repay them for that.

"Ah, you're all here." Said the Russian beast through the giant screen of the computer plastered on the wall. She was grinning, watching me with those same eyes she gave me on that day. The day she chose to leave us behind. . . "I am certain zat you have made a decision by now?"

"What's it gonna be jinx?" Seymour asked, watching me carefully, all of them waiting for me to give an answer. Whether I had doubts or not, whether this was right or wrong, I didn't have a choice. If I were to be damned for this, if I were to be doomed into an eternity of misery I had only the universe to blame. That was what drove me down this path, what forced me into the life we created for ourselves. But if I were destined to be drawn into hell, then I'd fight at all cost to save my family, to achieve what we planned for years, because I owed them that. And no matter how hard the devil tried to win against us. . .

I wouldn't back down without a fight.

 **"We're in."**

"Good. I have high hopes for you, my little kitten." The woman smirked, eyeing me suspiciously through the screen in a way that only I seemed to catch. Whatever she was planning, whether she knew who I was or not, I wouldn't let her intimidate me. Not again, because I wasn't the same little girl she chose to leave behind that day. I was stronger, smarter, and this time I'd surely prove my superiority to her, this time. . .

I'd beat her.

"Vee vill be in touch soon." The transmission ended with just that and the screen went straight to static before falling black.

"Y'all, we finally did it!" Billy cheered, high fiving his clone after today's victory.

"Was there ever any doubt?" Gizmo muttered, shoving the two idiots standing in his way. This was a moment of success. We had finally reached the first step into achieving our goal. This was a good thing, a great thing, it was suppose to be at least. I had expected to feel marvelous when it came to our acceptance into the Brotherhood of Evil. It had been my dream for so long, but now it was different. I had gotten caught up in other dreams, fantasies, wishes that were made after spending time with the redhead cities away. Maybe it'd always be this way. Maybe none of this would ever excite me again, because so much had changed. Everything was different, I was different and. . .

 _I_ had changed.

"I'm hungry." Mammoth groaned, patting his growling stomach as they headed for the halls.

"I say we steal some grub from one of them local taco trucks!" Billy suggested, running for the exit down the hall with his many clones following behind.

"You in, kyd?" Gizmo asked, waiting for the cloaked figure to nod and follow them to their destination.

"You made the right choice." Seymour whispered, the two of us left standing alone as the others went scurrying down the hall.

"It never should have been a choice to begin with." I turned to him, realizing my mistakes in all of this when facing him alone, "You were right, this is where my loyalty should have always been. I promise I'll tell the others about-"

"Don't." He stopped me, shaking his head rapidly for me to keep quiet, "For their sake, it's probably better to keep it on the DL."

He was right, he was normally right about these kinds of things. If I told them, told them what I knew, what I had done, there'd be no forgiveness. They were all counting on me - _Gizmo_ was counting on me. He was still a child, we were all he had, and if I took that away from him, if I told him what I had done, he'd never look at me the same. I couldn't do that to them, I couldn't be honest with them at this point. Which was why I needed to hide the truth. That way, it wouldn't be a lie. . .

Because they'd never know.

"You guys comin' or what?" Gizmo screamed from down the hall, annoyed and impatient in waiting for us to join.

"Hungry?" Seymour asked.

"Nah, you go on ahead. I'm pretty tired as it is." I tried to smile, stepping back to send them all off on their own.

"Right." He muttered, leaning forward to leave a quick kiss on my lips, "See ya when I get back."

"Okay. . ." I nodded, watching as he went rushing out to join the rest. And then, finally. . .

 _I_ was alone.

I returned to my bedroom, wanting to take my mind off of everything. Off of this team, the struggles, Seymour. . . and _Wally_. But he was everywhere. He was in my head, in my room, in the darkness, he was even in my reflection. The pendant was only a reminder of him. It shined, it shimmered, just as brightly as his smile. I couldn't return it, I couldn't keep it, all it did was weaken me, because it reminded me of the life I could never have with him. . .

The life I desired.

I fought the tears and tore the necklace off of me. I raised it high up in the air, holding it tightly, ready to toss it into the bin and say goodbye. I had to do it, I needed to let him go or I'd never be able to forget. I'd never be able to move on. But no matter how hard I tried - I couldn't let him go. I couldn't throw it away. I couldn't say goodbye because I didn't _want_ to. I didn't _want_ to forget him or any of it. And that's what made it impossible to move forward alone. . .

Because he was my weakness.

And as I fell to the ground, holding the pendant in my hand, I knew there'd be no recovering from this. I let the tears slip down my cheek, clutching the little piece I had left of him while banging my head against the wall. I wanted this to end, I wanted to stop feeling this way, because then I'd _never_ be of any use to the others. And that was the last thing I wanted. This was never suppose to happen, he was never suppose to have this affect on me. I just didn't get what it was that drew me back. But at this point none of that mattered now. It was useless in wondering why, when I had heard it all before. It was like a disease. Once you caught it, it'd be too late to cure. It'd consume you, eat you whole, until it was all you could think about. And I had been infected. There was no _cure_ , no _medicine_ to help ease the pain, because no matter how hard you tried, there was no getting over it. . .

 **Your first love.**


	8. Chapter 7: I Love You

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 ** _Sequel to: The Story You Never Knew_**

 **Tell Me You Love Me**

 ** _(Boy Epic)_**

 ** _Tell me you love me just one time_**  
 ** _Just give me one night_**  
 ** _I'll be the secret on your lips_**  
 ** _Let me be that one kiss_**  
 ** _If you fall_**  
 ** _Fall into my arms_**  
 ** _Come and fall_**  
 ** _Break down your walls_**  
 ** _And_**

 ** _Tell me you love me one time_**  
 ** _I can see the truth in your eyes_**  
 ** _Say you will_**  
 ** _Forget tomorrow and be with me tonight_**  
 ** _Just tell me you love me one time_**  
 ** _And this isn't goodbye_**

* * *

 **Chapter 7: I love you**

 **Kid flash**

It was quiet. Everything was still. Nothing seemed to matter at this point. The cold had no affect on me, everything was deafening. My heartbeat being the only reminder that all of this was real. She had left me, she was gone, and I had lost her for good.

One day. I couldn't even keep her happy for one day. My one goal lost forever the moment she walked out that door. And though the windows were opened, and the wind blew heavily over me, I felt as if I were suffocating. The pain she left behind was eating at me, making it so that I couldn't focus on anything other than just that - the pain.

And as I stared at the card in my hand, recalling all the events that had occurred within the months she had been in my life, I understood now. . . just how terrible of person I truly was. The concept of love and soul mates, what really separated the two, where she stood in my life, where I stood in hers, all these thoughts and questions I laid wondering about for hours in bed. But the answer was never clear, just like our paths. All this time wasted. . .

On something that was never meant to be.

"What was I suppose to do?" I asked myself in a whisper, turning over on my side to lay and gaze out the window. There was never an easy road with her, nothing could ever satisfy her for long. She was a miserable being, she was rude, annoying, and abusive. . .

But I loved her.

Her thoughts, her views, they were all refreshing because they were completely different from my own. She was like a rare species, one on the brink of extinction. That was why I wanted to cherish each moment I had with her. The girl with a smile not many got to see, but when it showed it shined brighter than the sun itself.

Maybe it had always been that way from the moment we first met as children. I feel like even then I was sure that she'd be the only one for me. She drew me in like a moth to a flame, and in the process. . .

I got burned.

I shut my eyes and tried to sleep, knowing very well she was all I could think about when awake. But it wasn't an easy task. She was hard to simply forget about and just when I was ready to _try_ \- something appeared. You could hear it climbing through branches and leaves. A body plunging from out of the night and into my bedroom through the opened window. It's figure dark, hidden in shadows, until it rose up to look over at me.

"Jinx?" I couldn't believe my eyes. My heart racing in simply seeing her face, despite how scared she appeared in front of me, "What are you doing here?" I asked, rushing out of bed to approach the girl I hadn't expected to see again so soon. My thoughts filled with high hopes that she had changed her mind, she was here to stay, and that our feelings had finally caught up with one another. . .

"I thought you'd be asleep. . ." She turned away from me, eyes glancing at the door across from us, "Are your Aunt and Uncle home?"

"No, they're still at the hospital." I assured her, my eyes catching a glimpse of a shimmering object flashing in her hand, "What are you doing here?" I asked again, eager to hear her reasons for returning. A smile ready to spread wide over my face, until I noticed her heavy glare fixed on me as she held her hand out. . .

"I came to return this." She cleared her throat, revealing the pendant I had only just returned to her hours before, "I made a mistake. I won't be doing it again."

"I don't want it." I answered abruptly. My anger blazing through at watching another attempt she made in throwing me away.

"Well, neither do I." She said scornfully, tossing the pendant to the ground before she turned for the window to leave.

"Jinx, if this is about before. . . " She stopped to listen, her head turning only slightly as I continued, "I wasn't trying to upset you or-"

"It's not that." She cut me off, eyes refusing to meet mine in her act of leaving me again, "We're just too different. We clash way too much and-"

"Have you been crying?" Her red, puffy eyes were shown under the moon's light. Yet she refused to show her face to me completely, turning way to hide in the shadows alone.

"Of course not."

"Stop lying to me." I reached for her hand. Cold, soft, tiny fingers, trembling when met with my own.

"This can't happen anymore, West." She said below a whisper, barely enough for my ears to catch. But they managed to listen, her words always tearing at my heart whenever she felt the need to run from me. Despite knowing very well that no matter where she went, where she hid. . .

There was no outrunning the fastest kid alive.

"Why not?" I asked, gripping her small hand to keep her here with me, fearing she'd disappear much quicker if I dared let go, "You were having fun today, Rose. I know you were-"

"That doesn't change anything." She shook her head, sliding her hand out of mine to step for the window.

"It changes everything!" I screamed, holding her arm to stop her from running away. Not again. Not like this. Not when she had no real reason to do so. . .

"I'm joining the brotherhood of evil." Her words took me by surprise, and it was only then that she decided to turn around and look me in the eyes to finally confirm it herself, "It's already official."

"You can't be serious?" I chuckled quietly, hoping she'd join in and admit this had all been one huge joke. That she had chosen me after all, and that all of this was just her way of admitting it. . .

But that wasn't the case.

"It's better if we just forget everything that happened here. Between us I mean. . ." She yanked her arm out of my hold, standing steadily by the window for a moment as I watched her, my legs frozen in place. And it was only until she placed her hands on the window sill that I found the strength to go after her again. My arms wrapping and holding her where she stood, not wanting to let her go, not wanting to believe that she had chosen anything other than this; than _us_.

"I can't do that!" I shouted, burying my face in the hood of her jacket.

"Let me go." She ordered calmly.

"I won't!" I yelled again, gripping even tighter in my preparation for her resistance against me.

"Don't you get it?" She shook her head, eyes glancing back to find me, "I'm your enemy. I'm suppose to destroy you."

"Then do it. . ." I shrugged, no longer fearing death if it came at her hands. There was no way I could fight against her on the field, no way I could lose her now. The only option she had was to get rid of me here before it was too late. Because I wouldn't survive without her by my side. . .

 _ **"Kill me, Rose."**_

"Do you think this is a game!?" She snapped, pushing my arms away to turn around and face me on her own this time.

"No." I shook my head, my tone and eyes serious as I met with a pair of shocked, pink ones, "But I know you well enough to see that this isn't what you want."

"What I want doesn't matter now." She stared at the ground, fighting against her own desires that were so clear to me. I could see them in her eyes, her dreams, her hopes and wishes. And as I stepped forward to cup her cheek and return her sight to me, I knew that _this_ was only part of the future she truly craved. . .

"Yes it does." I told her, leaning in closer to whisper quietly, "Rose, _please_ just stop. You don't have to do this. . ." Her eyes shimmered with tears as they searched deep into my own, moving back and forth as if to understand whether or not my words could be true. . .

"I don't have a choice anymore." She breathed, removing my hand off her face to turn away again. My body, reacting on instinct, launched forward to hold her before she could run from me.

"That's not true."

"Why can't you understand!?" She cried out.

"Why can't you!?" I snapped, my anger only then catching up to match with hers when finally admitting the truth, "I love you. Don't you get that?"

There was a long moment of silence. My face buried in her back to dry the tears that had fallen. The sound of her pulse racing could be heard due to her lack of breathing. She was frozen like a statue, making me far more nervous in guessing what her response would be. Rejection, anger, hatred. Those were my only thoughts. But instead, I was met with a far more unexpected reply. . .

"Y-You don't mean that. . ." I could feel her shaking her head, body slightly trembling as I held her tighter.

"Yes I do." I whispered, my ears barely catching onto the tiny sobs she let out, "Rose, I've been in love with you from the moment we first met. . ."

"Take it back." She ordered, sniffling while trying to maintain a steady tone.

"I can't." I said, my feet stumbling backwards as she spun over to push me away.

"I said take it back!" She screamed, pink sparks flickering as she raised her fist to my head.

"I'm not gonna lie to you!" My words came out through anger and determination. There was no way I could erase the feelings she had created in the short time we had been together, in the days we wasted in battling, the moments shared in the library, or the many years I spent in loving the little girl in the attic.

And then, she started to cry.

Tears escaped along with the most painful expression I had ever seen her carry. She lowered her hand, sparks gone, and instead aimed in punching my chest. She cried and cried, hitting against me with all the anger she had pent-up inside her. She hit me with the hatred she carried, not just for me or the rest of the world, but herself. And I could feel that, I could feel that anger releasing the weaker her hits became, because she was trying to fight against this, us, me. . .

And all of her feelings.

"You idiot! Why'd you have to say that!?" She screamed in sobs, her fists coming in slower the longer she wasted in trying to hurt me. All in the process of getting me to hate her, though the only one in pain was _her._ All due to the logic she held for herself in believing she deserved nothing more but a lifetime of misery. And I hated that about her, I hated how she continuously tried ruining herself with that way of thinking. Out of fear of the possibility that the world could offer her more than just this, than just her past. . .

And I wanted to show her that.

My hand caught the fist she tried throwing at me again, holding it tightly to yank her forward and catch her lips. She pressed her hands against my chest, _almost_ wanting to break away, though the light force she gave proved otherwise. Her lips moved against my own as we slid to the floor against the wall. Tears mixing in with the taste of her mouth as tiny sobs escaped seconds later. That was my queue to pull away, not wanting to start another panic attack like in the past, but I didn't leave her side. I kept by her, our foreheads pressed against one another as she lowered her eyes to cry. . .

"Please, don't do this. . ." I begged, shutting my lids in not wanting to see the pain she carried on her face.

"It's already too late." She muttered quietly, trying to pull away as I held her arms to keep her next to me.

"It's never too late." My eyes opened to find her staring at me with a shocked filled gaze. We were right back to where we started. Right at that museum, where all her doubts had begun to slowly form. . .

Because of me.

"It is this time." She turned away.

"Rose-"

"I kissed Seymour." She said it quickly, refusing to look at me when admitting it out loud. But I didn't know what to say, how to act, because it wasn't adding up. Which was why I couldn't find it in me to be upset. . .

Because she wasn't being honest.

"You're lying." I squinted in searching for the truth, "You wouldn't have done that on your own. You couldn't have unless. . . he kissed you first." Her lips parted slightly, head turning back to look at me, baffled by my correct guess which I knew had to be right. There was no other way of explaining an act such as that, because she wasn't a traitor. She was loyal to those she cared for, and I knew, somewhere, deep down, she cared about me too. . .

"Did he?" I asked, watching as she forced out a laugh and laid her head against the wall.

"Does it really matter?" She shrugged, playing the bad guy role when grinning back at me. But this wasn't her, this was her other persona, this was jinx, the thieving criminal who had been misunderstood and tormented for all of her heinous acts. . .

But this wasn't Rose.

"It does." I said, her smile falling as she tried kicking me away.

"I still kissed him back!" She yelled, trying to stand up again, "Don't you get that? I had to choose and I chose him. I chose _them_."

"Do you love him?" I asked after taking her legs and keeping them pinned to the floor.

"That's. . . none of your business." She looked away, refusing to lie when she herself knew she couldn't without giving it away.

"You _are_ my business."

"You don't own me, West!" She spat, my wrong choice of words bringing her eyes glowing pink as she tried breaking free from my grip.

"You're right!" I shouted, releasing her legs to reach for her hand instead. Thus, taking her tiny fingers to place against my chest, holding them close to my racing heart that reacted in simply feeling her touch on me, "But you own me. You've always had my heart. Are you really going to throw it away just like that?"

"Wally, please. . ." She cried lightly, strands of hair falling over her face as she dropped her head to stare at the ground, "Just let me go."

"Answer me, Rose." I lifted her chin, pushing pieces of hair over the back of her ear, "Can you really say goodbye after this?"

"Wally, it'll never work!" She cried out in a scream, taking her hand back to place them over her ears.

"How do you know?" I snapped, gripping her wrists to pull her forward, "How can you let your team force you to give up on something that we-"

"Because I'm scared!" She shouted, her head falling over my chest as tears soaked my shirt, "I'm so scared, West. . ."

"Then be with me." I said softly, hands slowly wrapping around her as she kept her face buried against me, "I promised you I'd protect you. That I'd make you happy, remember?"

"I'm never gonna be happy. . . " She sobbed, her head slowly moving back to look up at me, "Wally, they're all I have, they're my home. . ."

"They don't have to be." I told her, placing both hands on the sides of her face as I wiped away tears she let stain her cheeks.

"Wally, if I leave them then I'll have _nothing_. Nowhere to go, no one to turn to-"

"You'll have me." I assured her, pulling her into my embrace when whispering into her ear to offer her a solution, "Move in with me."

"What?"

"Stay here with me. You don't have to be alone in this. I can take care of you, I can _protect_ you here." I placed my chin over the top of her head as the room fell quiet again.

She didn't say anything. She didn't move or make any efforts in escaping. Not even when I pulled her away, or leaned down to kiss her again. She just went along with it, never giving me a real answer. . .

And she didn't stop me.

Those light kisses grew stronger. Far more passionate as I bit and nipped at her bottom lip, my desires rising the longer we remained pressed against one another. It was then that all other thoughts left me for that one moment, bringing me to lift her up and carry her to the mattress without ever breaking from those sweet, soft, lips.

My hands crept up her top and enjoyed the feel of her smooth skin. My lips attacking and sucking on her neck as I furthered my way down to her waist. The sound of her voice, of quiet, gentle moans, were like music to my ears. And I wanted more. I wanted all of her and all that she had to offer, because I wanted to make her _mine_.

But the moment my hands reached for the buttons of her jeans, she flinched and pulled away. She was still scared, still uncertain of her own decisions, and I didn't want to force her into anything. Though it was unbearably difficult. I stared down at her, trying to catch my breath, all for the sake of maintaining my sanity. Because if I couldn't remain in control, then I knew I'd hurt her, I knew she'd hate me, and I refused to lose her for a simple night of pleasure. Because what I wanted, what I needed, was not just her body. . .

But her heart.

"I'm sorry. . . " I whispered, panting while trying to pace my breathing with hers. I hovered over her, hands keeping me up from crushing her tiny frame, and I was ready to push myself off to lay on the bed instead. But, suddenly, she surprised me by wrapping both arms around my neck. A small smile forming on her lips when gazing into my eyes to speak. . .

"Don't stop." She pulled me back down to place a gentle kiss on my lips, all in signaling me to move forward in what I had only ever dreamed of doing with her.

"Rose, you don't have to-"

"I want to." She said, hiding her face in the crook of my neck as she leaned closer to whisper something into my ear. . .

 _ **"I trust you."**_

My heart set off rows of fireworks in my chest after hearing the words I had desperately worked to hear. I had regained what was lost, or what was never truly there till now, and that meant more to me than anything I had ever received from anyone in the past. Because she was mine, and after tonight I knew she'd be willing to become just that. . .

"I love you so much. . ." I couldn't stop the tears from falling, and she smiled when seeing it before wiping them away herself. I held her tightly in my arms, enjoying the warmth we created with our body's.

We were of different worlds, she and I. Almost like two completely different colors that wouldn't mix well. But I forced it to sink in with hers, my body melting in with the colors that made up her soul. I loved her, which was why I wanted nothing more than to belong to her, and to become someone important to her. Even so, I hadn't expected for the night to end the way it did. Nor did I ever expect to hear the sweet words she gave right at the very end, and that would forever be a memory that would stay with me for the rest of my life. . .

 **"I love you too. . ."**


	9. Chapter 8: It's Over Now

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 ** _Sequel to: The Story You Never Knew_**

 **Call Me**

 _ **(ShineDown)**_

 _ **I finally put it all together,**_  
 _ **But nothing really lasts forever**_  
 _ **I had to make a choice that was not mine,**_  
 _ **I had to say goodbye for the last time**_  
 _ **. . .**_  
 _ **I've said it so many times**_  
 _ **I would change my ways**_  
 _ **No, nevermind**_  
 _ **God knows I've tried**_

 _ **Call me a sinner, call me a saint**_  
 _ **Tell me it's over I'll still love you the same**_  
 _ **Call me your favorite, call me the worst**_  
 _ **Tell me it's over I don't want you to hurt**_  
 _ **It's all that I can say. So, I'll be on my way**_

* * *

 **Chapter 8: It's Over Now**

 **Jinx**

My body laid tossing and turning on his bed. The sun's light falling over exposed flesh, warming me up from the inside. It was nice. It was soothing. But it wasn't the light or it's warmth that woke me. It was the emptiness on his side of the mattress. My arm fell over to touch the cold sheets on where his body once laid resting. Now he was gone. Would he be back? Had he left me for good? Was I merely a toy? All these questions raced through my head and brought me sitting up in search for him. Panic, fear, betrayal - those were the only emotions that surfaced when I called out his name.

"Wally!" There was no response at first, several seconds passing in silence. It was dreadful. It was awful. The worst kind of feeling one could ever feel after giving their body to the person they loved and trusted. It was for that reason that tears began to form in my eyes. My body curling itself up in a ball in fear that I was nothing more to him but this - a one night fling. . .

A whore.

"Hey, you're up." His smile radiated from the doorway, his head peeking out with a towel placed over his dripping red hair, "You okay?" He asked. His feet slowly making their way over before plopping himself next to me. And almost like a reflex, something that felt so natural and out of my control, my arms swung around to hold him.

"I thought you left me. . ." I whispered, his laughter present when hearing my words. It was embarrassing sharing such thoughts, especially in a bed where I sat wearing very little clothing, but none of that mattered to me. This, him, his warmth, that was all I wanted to take in.

"Now who's being paranoid." He teased, gently pushing me back to place a small kiss on my forehead, "I'm not going anywhere, okay?"

My eyes stared at soft, plumped lips. Almost hypnotic, magnetic, in a way that had me rushing forward to kiss them with my own, "I know." I whispered back, feeling him smile when returning the kiss.

"So how are you feeling?" He asked, pushing strands of hair over my shoulder to meet my gaze with a serious one, "Your body okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine" I nodded, face flushed red after turning away. My nerves forcing me to avoid talking about it even more by searching and reaching for the clothing that laid on his floor.

"That scar. . ." I heard him mumble quietly after I got out of bed. My humiliation forcing me to quickly cover the markings with the top I slipped on, "How'd you get it?" His question this time came out sharper than before. Part of me was scared to turn and face him, but it was that fear that forced me to look back and smile at the boy who seemed to be far more upset about it then I ever was. . .

"It's pretty ugly isn't it?" I laughed quietly, sliding my hair out to comb through with my fingers. It wasn't a pretty sight to see after all. He himself even appeared displeased with the wounds marked on me from my past. But rather than agree or drop the subject, he took my hand and pulled me onto his lap before leaning down to kiss my shoulder.

"You're perfect the way you are." He breathed, nuzzling his face in the nape of my neck. He was beyond strange. How a guy like him could ever be interested in a creature like myself was something no one would ever understand. He was just odd. A mind not like the average human, which is what I loved most about him, and why I felt like. . .

I could trust him with the truth.

"My label." I muttered, body tensing with the memory of it, "They knew us by numbers, not names. Kind of like a way to keep every kid in check. . ." I tried laughing it off after feeling him pull back slightly. My body flinching at his sudden actions in lifting my shirt to touch the number _five_ forever stained on my back. Most people would have cringed at the sight, even I myself, but he wasn't like that. He touched it without any disgust, as if it were a normal thing to him.

"Did it hurt a lot?" His question had me laughing slightly. It wasn't funny, it was just so unexpected that I couldn't help but react as if it were humorous in a way.

"Well, it didn't tickle so. . ." I shrugged, hoping he'd crack some stupid joke about it too. But he didn't take the situation lightly at all. Which is why it did surprise me when he stayed serious for so long, holding me with trembling arms that made the situation far more uncomfortable.

"I'm sorry." He whispered, making it difficult to distinguish on whether the tone in his voice came from pity or sympathy. Either way I hated hearing both. I hated being viewed as the weak kid with a tough past, because that wasn't who I was anymore. So, without saying anything else, I moved back and leaned forward to have us reconnect.

A passionate kiss was exchanged, one that had us licking and sucking painfully slow. Tongues were met, dancing with one another for a while. Our bodies falling back on the mattress as the desire to completely lose myself in him took over. But just before anything else could progress, we both jumped at the sound of his door creaking open and light footsteps entering inside.

"Wally, did you want me to make extra-"

"Aunt I!" He yelled, his body falling over to shield my own in it's half dressed form.

"I'm so sorry!" She yelled from out in the hall after slamming the door shut. Only then did I deem it okay to smack the redhead and push him off to quickly reach for my jeans.

"You said no one was home!" I whispered out loud, eyes stuck on the door in fear that someone else would come barging in.

"She came back an hour ago." He tried to explain, "She offered to make breakfast! What was I suppose to do?"

"Make it yourself." I aimed a pillow at his face, one in which he managed to dodge with his speed.

"But she makes the best chocolate chip pancakes!"

"You're an idiot." I grimaced, a sigh escaping my lips after buttoning my jeans and moving on in my search for my jacket.

"And you just love reminding me, don't you?" He followed after me to reel me back, "You know this changes everything now, right?"

"Oh?" I raised a brow, eyes fixated on the redheads gaze of lust.

"Yup, because now that we finally did it, it's going to be 24/7 from here on out." He said with a cheeky grin, arms wrapping around my waist when he tried leaning forward for another kiss.

"Don't be such a perv!" I said after flicking the end of his nose.

"I'm serious!" He frowned, "I'm talkin' in the showers, at school, I don't even care if we're standing under a waterfall! Just know that I don't plan on ever stopping!" He shouted, my panic returning in fear that his guardians would hear him downstairs. That weakness in which he took advantage of by pinning me back down on the mattress.

"You're so gross!" I yelled, fighting the urge to laugh when I tried turning away from each peck he tried planting on my face.

"Oh and one more thing." He stopped, jumping off the bed to rush for his dresser. I barely had any time to see what it was he pulled out after sitting back up, and by that time a flash had already gone off in front of me.

"What are you doing!?" I tried lunging for the camera he had in his hands, knowing very well how ridiculous I must have looked after snapping a photo of me unprepared.

"Don't worry it's only for my eyes." He grinned, waving the camera too high for me to reach despite my several hops to get it.

"What do you need that for?" I asked in a whiny tone as he guided me back to the bed.

"Memories." He muttered quietly, wrapping an arm around me to take another shot, "Smile."

The flash went off quick. My eyes blinking several times at the sensitivity of it's strong light. If it had been anyone else doing it I would have broken the thing without any hesitation. But it was impossible to do that when I noticed the expression he had while staring at the image on the screen. It was soft; loving.

"Alright, we're gonna be late for school." I reminded him in my efforts to leave his side. But he refused to leave the room at that point and dragged me back to keep me laying next to him.

"C'mon, we can ditch one day." He pouted, embracing me with strong arms.

"You're ridiculous." I complained, sighing in defeat before turning on my side to stare into sapphire eyes.

"But you love me." He grinned, fingers brushing against my cheek. "You really surprised me though."

"What do you mean?"

"Last night," He shrugged, eyes lowering, "I didn't think you'd be up to. . . you know."

"It's not like I planned it or anything." I turned away, feeling my face heat up in hearing him talk about it so casually.

"So, how long have you been on the pill?" He nudged, his question making me turn back in confusion.

"What pill?"

"You know the pill to. . ." His words trailed off as wide eyes slowly met with mine, "Dammit!" He sat up, stumbled onto the floor and rushed out of the room, only to return seconds later with a white, round pill.

"Quick, take this." He spoke fast, shoving it close to my face even after I tried pushing him away.

"What is it?" I stared at it, keeping his hand at a fair distance to wait for an answer.

"A breath mint." He said with a dull expression, sarcasm clearly stated before he tried shoving it back, "What do you think? It's the morning after pill."

"Why do you have that?" I furrowed my brows, my body cringing at the thought of whatever else he'd been using it for. Though anything seemed far better than the answer he was about to give. . .

"I keep a stash whenever I bring a girl. . ." My heart dropped in even hearing half of that sentence, and he could tell it upset me when he cut himself off to force the thing down my throat, "Nevermind, just take it."

"Ew, gross no." I smacked it away, our eyes both watching it roll across the floor, "That'll just make me sick."

"You know what else will make you sick?" He smiled sarcastically at first, letting it drop when he shared his answer out loud, "A baby! Rose, I didn't use protection last night. So this isn't up for debate right now."

"Wally, relax. I don't need protection." I assured him, my back pressed against the headboard as I stared at the redhead who's panic didn't cease.

"Rose, I love you and all, and I love that whole risk taking vibe you got going on." He laughed, arms waving in his efforts to better convince me, "But I don't think either of us are ready for parenthood right now, so if you could just-"

"Wally, I cant get pregnant!" I yelled, hoping he'd drop the subject and leave it at that.

"What are you talking about?" He persisted, seeking answers I hadn't been prepared to give. But the grip he had on my wrist proved to me that this was something that couldn't be avoided. He wouldn't let it go, because he wanted to understand me. _Me_. . .

And _Every_ little thing.

"Let's just say it was their last gift to me after I got my powers. . ." I laughed, my hand placing itself over the emptiness of my stomach, "I guess they were scared we'd reproduce other little monsters they couldn't control."

"Meaning what exac-"

"They removed my ovaries, moron." I snapped, quickly snatching my hand out of his after being reminded of the one thing I could never have in this life. . .

 **"I can't have kids."**

"But that's. . ." His eyes fell on the bed sheets. He was trying to go over everything in his head, all that had happened, all that we'd done. I could tell because of the silence we exchanged. He was debating, he was trying to make a decision. . .

 _He was ready to give up._

"You starting to have doubts now?" I grinned, hoping to hide my own sadness.

"Of course not. . ." He answered quickly with a hand slowly reaching out to fall on my leg, "I just wasn't expecting that."

"Yeah, well it worked for me at the beginning." I shrugged, sliding his hand off to scoot back, "I never wanted to get married or settle down before, so I figured it wasn't all that bad till now. . ."

"Rose, this doesn't change anything." He whispered, leaning closer to have our eyes meet, "It's not like we're trying to have kids anyway. Plus, never needing to use protection's also a bonus for both of us." He smirked, no doubt with inappropriate thoughts every teenage boy normally had.

"You'll feel differently later on." I tried to smile, my legs moving to the edge of the bed to step off, "Wally, I can't give you a family or anything like that-"

"I don't care." He took my hand, standing back up to follow my lead, "Right now, you're all I want."

My heart raced when hearing another share such words with me. To be what he craved, all he desired, it had me yearning for a moment like this to never end. And as he stepped forward my breathing hitched in my throat, and I could feel his eyes sending a telepathic message into my skull.

 _Touch me._

Words like those weren't needed for us to understand. Everything between us just seemed clearer now. Lips pressed, hand's roamed, touching, caressing, stroking nearly every inch of exposed flesh. But somehow the moment managed to be ruined by the sound of his laughter. Though part of me enjoyed listening to it, it was during moments like these that I found such behavior extremely annoying.

"What?" I pulled away, watching as he smiled down at me and shook his head.

"Nothing, just. . ." He paused, pulling me in closer with a smile that never left his face, "I like hearing you call me that."

"Call you what?"

"Wally." He shrugged, "I mean, West is my favorite. You're the only one whoever calls me that. But hearing you say my first name makes me kinda happy. . ."

"You're so weird." I shoved his face away, shaking my head before my sight fell on the pill left on the floor, "So how many girls did you normally bring over?" I looked back at him. His smile only then vanishing as he nervously moved away.

"That's. . ." He hesitated, "I only kept those to be safe. It's not like I was fooling around with someone every night."

"Weren't you?"

"Well," He cleared his throat, eyes avoiding mine, "not _every_ night but. . ."

"How many?" I moved forward.

"Does it really matter?" He quickly asked, finally looking at me before taking my hands, "I chose you, Rose. Not Stacy or any other girl, just you. You're the only one I want."

I sighed in defeat, "I guess I can't blame you for your past. . ." I rolled my eyes, knowing very well I had no right to judge him myself when I was no better, "I mean I did make a few mistakes myself."

"Like with that Leo guy?" He mentioned with a light chuckle that escaped his lips.

"How'd you-"

"I heard you two chatting during your first brotherhood meet up."

"Yeah, well he was just _one_ of the many mistakes. . ." I stepped back, staring up at the blue of the sky that unveiled through his window, "There was also cyborg who-"

"You dated cyborg!?" He flipped out, tightly grabbing me by my shoulders.

"He never told you?" I furrowed my brows, though not as surprised as I probably should have been. After all, I was certain he most likely thought of me as a mistake as well. . .

"And this whole time he-"

"Relax, it wasn't anything serious." I assured him, "He was only using me to complete his own mission."

" _Using_ you?" He asked in a hoarse whisper.

"Just one of my many mistakes. . ." I repeated jokingly, hoping to ease the tension.

"Did you guys ever, like, do stuff. . .?" His way of asking made it clear as to what he was trying to imply, and frankly, I was just as eager to clear the air about it as he was in listening to it.

"No, we didn't. Like I said, it wasn't serious."

"So I'm still number one, right?" He asked, tightly gripping my fingers when pulling me forward.

"Yeah, moron." I laughed, "You come in number one with all those stupid roses."

"Stupid? I thought you liked my roses?" He stared.

"I didn't hate them," I shrugged once, "but they're not my favorite flower."

"Says the girl named Rose." He snorted.

"Not like I chose my name." I rolled my eyes, then left his side to move for the opened window.

"Then what is your favorite flower?" He asked from behind.

"Lilies." I admitted in a whisper as he came over, without any warning, to hold me in his arms.

" _Lilies_?" He repeated. I nodded once.

"It was the first flower I spotted after my escape. It's been my favorite ever since. . ."

"A lily huh? That's actually a pretty name too. . ." He mentioned as the two of us gazed out at the world happily.

"Yeah, it is." I nodded, turning back around to embrace him myself. My head rested on his chest and enjoyed the soft kisses he left on my head. The sound of his heartbeat soothed me in a way that I never thought possible. It was nice. This was my dream, my wish, everything I craved. The love I couldn't have, the love I desired more than anything. . .

And the love I'd need to abandon.

"I'm going to miss this. . ." I breathed quietly. My thought's accidentally escaping.

"What do you mean?" I heard him laugh as he tried pulling me back, but I refused to let go at that point. I didn't want to see his face, because then I'd have to lie. And he was so good at noticing the difference between the truth and all that I tried to hide. . .

Then we heard a buzz.

My communicator called for me. It waited in the pocket of my jacket placed on the floor. This was it. This was our wake up call to my reality. The end of a dream that could never be completed, because this. . .

This could never be real.

"I have to answer." I tried moving for it, letting myself slip away only to be yanked back by the redhead's firm grip.

"Tell me what you meant by that. . ." He asked, but my head was kept turned away in my refusal to answer, "You're still going to join them aren't you?"

"I told you I already agreed to it." I whispered back, yanking my hand forward, "I can't just turn my back on them now-"

"Yes you can!" He shouted, following me as I reached down to take the call, "You can easily walk away from this Rose. They can't hurt you with me-"

"That's not what matters here!" I tried reminding myself, "I made a promise that I have to keep. You have to understand th-"

"But I don't. I don't understand how you can sacrifice yourself for something like-"

"You said I wouldn't have to decide!" I whipped around, yelling at the boy always ready to take back anything that didn't interest him.

"That was before last night!" He shouted, taking both my wrists after I'd managed to take the device from out of my jacket pocket, "You said you loved me. . ."

" _I'm sorry_ , but my family has to come first. . ." My voice came out shaking, my breathing shuddering after witnessing the fall of our perfect morning, "I'm not asking you to sacrifice anything for me. Why can't you do the same?"

"Because my family isn't _poisoning_ my relationship! They're not ruining my life!"

It buzzed again. A second call signaling that if I didn't answer now something bad would most likely happen again. So I said nothing more to him. I just pushed him off and answered the call instead.

"Yeah?"

"Jinx, where are you?" It was Seymour. He didn't sound all that panicked, nor worried, which gave no suspicion to him or us at all.

"I'm at school right now. Just trying to prep up for an English test. . ." I lied, but it was good enough to fool him. After our last conversation the trust between us had finally been restored. But it could only last for so long. Meaning, just because he wasn't tracking me now, didn't mean he wouldn't try later on.

"Oh, okay then. Just be sure to come straight home this time. The others wanna celebrate together."

"Alright, I'll talk to you later then." I hung up right after. Not wanting to give away any emotion through the pain in my voice.

"This shouldn't have to be kept a secret." The redhead glared from behind.

"Wally, I'm sor-"

"You can't play both sides when he's in love with you too." His eyes slowly moved from off the ground to stare into mine. There was anger, hurt, betrayal - it was all there. . . and it scared me. It scared me because I almost couldn't recognize him at all.

"You have to choose."

"I did choose!" I snapped back. Guilt eating away at my anger when witnessing the heartbreak convey through deep blue eyes. I wanted to take it back, or explain myself better, because I knew just how awful of a person I was becoming. I never meant to hurt him, I never meant to play anyone, I just wanted to keep them both happy. I didn't want anyone to be upset, but it was impossible to do that when they craved the same thing. . .

"You're right, you did. . ." He laughed, cold and menacingly that it sent chills down my spine. He walked over to grab my jacket, tossed it into my arms, and looked at me with only two words needed to end the conversation. . .

 ** _"Get out."_**

"What?" I stood baffled by his reaction. He had every right to be mad and upset with me, but this was too much. After everything I had tried to do, all my efforts in maintaining a middle ground between both of them, all of it now meant nothing. . .

"You made your decision." He said tonelessly, shoving past me to move for the window alone.

"Wally, don't do this-"

"I'm not doing anything here Rose. You made your choice, so leave." He commanded, voice cold and distant as if speaking without any care for me at all.

"You know I can't just walk away from them!"

"And I can't be with someone who's prepared to walk away from me at any moment!" He growled, finally spinning back to look at me with a face burning a deep red. He was angry. No, he was beyond angry; he was furious. Hate. That was all I saw in him now. Not love, or affection. . .

Just hate.

"It's not like that." I choked out, lips quivering as tears stung my eyes.

"Just leave Rose!" He waved his hand to the door, "You wanted to be with him so go! But I'm not gonna let you play me too."

"Wally please. . ." I begged, desperately clinging onto the boy who had promised to love me. The boy who promised that there wouldn't need to be sides taken between us. Just this, just us, our love. That was suppose to be enough. That was what he swore, what he made me believe. . .

"I'm done." He muttered before leaning down to share his final thoughts with me, "If you wanna act like a slut, then I'll treat you like one. Get out!"

Instinct. My hand slapped him hard across the face on _instinct_ as tears slid down my cheeks in anger. He lied. He had always lied. Nothing he had ever said had been true, everything he had done was all for this, for one _stupid_ night. And I was the fool that had let herself get swept in with his words. At the end of the day, he was no different from all the rest. All of them. . .

They were all the same.

"Screw you, West." I hissed, gritting my teeth in my efforts to contain my anger. Though he made it difficult when he chuckled and looked back at me with a smug grin.

"You already did."

That was it. If he hadn't broken me enough before, then he had right there in that moment. And if I hadn't gone racing out of his room I was sure he'd have ruined me completely. . .

He watched me cry and did nothing but turn away. So I took my things and went running out alone. He never chased after me, he didn't seem sorry at all, and I was glad he hadn't. I was glad he had hurt me, because I deserved it. I deserved it and I needed it to let go. I needed it to realize he was no better than the men of my past. He was no hero, just a villain that knew how to play by the rules. A being fortunate enough to go through life without any struggles. That was what made us different, that was what divided our worlds, but now I was sure on where I was suppose to stand. My teammates, my mother, Seymour, they had been right all along. There was only one kind of life for me in this world and this was it. Not as a human, or a dweeb, not as Rose Adams - but as this. . .

 **The heinous criminal named _Jinx_.**


	10. Chapter 9: Try and Try Again

**Disclaimer: Teen Titans. I do not own the characters in the show - simply, just this story.**

 **Paring: Flinx ( Kid Flash x Jinx )**

 **"Let Her Go"**

 _ **Cover**_

 _ **(Tyler Ward & Kurt Schneider)**_

 _ **Well you only need the light when it's burning low**_  
 _ **Only miss the sun when it starts to snow**_  
 _ **Only know you love her when you let her go**_

 _ **Only know you've been high when you're feeling low**_  
 _ **Only hate the road when you're missing home**_  
 _ **Only know you love her when you let her go**_  
 _ **And you let her go**_

 _ **Staring at the bottom of your glass**_  
 _ **Hoping one day you'll make a dream last**_  
 _ **But dreams come slow and they go so fast**_

 _ **You see her when you close your eyes**_  
 _ **Maybe one day you'll understand why**_  
 _ **Everything you touch surely dies**_

* * *

 **Chapter 9: Try and Try Again**

 **Kid flash**

The waves crashed against rocky shores as I stared at the ocean floor. Problems still in my hands along with a few pebbles I threw into open waters. She hated me. There was no denying it this time. She actually hated me and with good reason too. I had betrayed her. I had been a traitor in her eyes for the millionth time in a row.

My brain just kept counting all the moments I had let her down. I had failed to save her the first time we'd met, I had threatened to ruin her life the first day on campus, I made her look like an idiot there as well, I sold her out to Stacy, and I chose to kick her out after spending the night with me. A decision I knew must have been harder on her the most.

And her face.

The look on her face when I said it. ** _'Get out_**.' Two little worlds and it was like everything between us had fallen. I regretted it instantly, but at that point it was too late to take it back. So I went with it. I reverted back to my old ways, the bully on campus. But I didn't think she'd actually leave. I thought after sleeping together she'd choose me for once. I thought she'd cave in and stay like I had wanted. But I was wrong. She still chose them, her family, over me - us. And I had pushed her to them. Even after I'd told her she wouldn't need to choose I still forced her to do it anyway. I drove her out and shattered all and any faith she had left in me. She'd never forgive me at this point and I didn't blame her. If I were her. . .

I'd hate me too.

"Shouldn't you be throwing rocks in your own city?" Said a figure that approached me from out of the darkness. The girl with strands of shimmering dark hair whose face hid underneath her hood.

"The weather here seemed nice today." I tried to laugh, quickly wiping away tears that had slipped minutes before her arrival.

"You ran all the way out here to throw rocks because of the weather?" She sat beside me, suspicion in her tone.

"Well when you say it like that it sounds stupid."

"Because it is."

"Yeah. . ." I sighed, flicking another stone as it danced over the water before melting into the blue, "I must really be an idiot then." I admitted. Not just to her, but to Rose. She'd been right after all. All this time, all these years, I'd been the moron. The biggest screw up and she. . . she was perfection. Perfection I had let slip away after throwing a stupid tantrum.

"Whats the other reason?" Raven stared, eyes dull and emotionless.

"Huh?"

"You don't expect me to believe the weather was the only reason you came out here, do you?" She raised a brow before returning her gaze to the open blue in front of us.

"What makes you think-" I stopped myself, knowing it'd be pointless to hide anything from her. Not because it was obvious, but because I was tired of it. I was tired of hiding her, denying her, and hurting her. . . "It's a long story."

"I've got some time." She quickly stated. I laughed.

"You must be bored."

"Well?" She turned to me, trying to skip the small talk to get to the real issue. Just like Rose.

"I messed up. . ." I shrugged, dropping pebbles into the water.

"At what?" She asked.

"Everything." I breathed quietly, laying back to stare at clear skies that twinkled with millions of stars.

"That sure narrows it down." I heard her mumble.

I inhaled deeply, shutting my eyes to keep from crying again, "Well to start off, my uncle's in the hospital because I couldn't be there to help. I broke a promise - actually several promises - and the heart of the only girl I've ever loved and. . ." I let my words trail off, reminding myself that if I put out anymore details I'd risk exposing secrets that weren't mine to share, "I must sound pretty pathetic, huh?"

"Sounds rough." She nodded with violet eyes glancing back.

"Yeah. . ." I forced a laugh, clearing my throat to maintain a steady tone, "I don't blame myself for getting mad at her, but I can't forgive myself for making her cry." That much was true. I didn't want to break my promise or make her upset, I just wanted her to choose me on her own. That was it. Even if she couldn't go through with it, I just wanted to hear her say it. You. I choose you Wally. That's all I needed to hear. . .

But I guess that was too selfish of me to ask.

"Your girlfriend you mean?" Raven tried to clarify. But even the mention of her, the label, my girlfriend. . . it was too much. Because she wasn't my girlfriend anymore. She wasn't even my friend. One day. I had one day with her and I screwed it up.

"God, what's wrong with me!" I yelled, slapping my hands over my eyes to better hide the tears, "I can't even get mad at her without hating myself for it. . ."

It was a rollercoaster of emotions. I hated her and I loved her. I couldn't stand her and yet I couldn't imagine my life without her. She annoyed the crap out of me and still I couldn't get enough. It was crazy. I was crazy. But that was love. And it hurt. It hurt like hell and I'd been the one responsible for it. It was painful enough on my end, so I couldn't even imagine how she felt after what I'd done. . .

"Have you tried talking to her?" Raven came over, placing a hand on my arm as I tried to wipe away the pain that leaked out of my eyes.

"It won't matter." I said, sitting up to turn away from the girl who couldn't understand the situation, "She's leaving anyway so whatever I say won't change anything."

"So you're giving up?" She asked.

"What choice do I have? She's never gonna talk to me again. Even if I regret it now she'll never forgive me. . ." It was true. There was no denying it. I could spend a century chasing after her and it wouldn't matter. I barely stood a chance before, which is why I knew there'd be no way she'd listen to me now.

"Huh. . ." Raven muttered under her breath before standing back up, "Then you probably didn't loved her to begin with."

"Of course I loved her!" I followed after her, "I loved her more than anything-"

"Then why are you giving up?" She turned back, "If you really loved her you wouldn't be able to walk away that easily. Even if she can't forgive you, you're not suppose to quit. You have to keep fighting or you'll really lose her in the end. " I opened my mouth to protest, fight back, and attack her with whatever I could think of. . . but there was nothing. She was right. I messed up, that was true. But by staying silent I was proving Rose right about something she'd actually been wrong about. I was nothing like the others. I never wanted to hurt her. Yet I did. I hurt her by acting just as selfishly as the rest of them - and that wasn't me.

It couldn't end here. Even if she denied me every time, there was no way I could love anyone but her in this life. I couldn't expect her to come to me. I couldn't expect fate to help me out again. It had done enough. It had let us meet as children, it had brought us together on the field, and it reunited us on campus. It had done more than enough. It had pushed us together right from the start, but it was a pointless effort if I stayed silent. I needed to act on this while I still had the chance, while she was still here. I had to be the one to make the first move. I had pushed her away so it was up to me to get her back. If I didn't I'd lose her for good, and that was something I'd never forgive myself for. There was nothing more before her, and things only got better with her around, but my future. . .

It'd be pointless without her in it.

"Thanks raven." I thanked her with a smile before jetting off.

It didn't matter how long it'd take. I needed to see her. I needed to accept whatever consequences waited for me, because I _had_ messed up. Whatever she had in mind I'd take it. A fist, a hex, even death was okay with me. Just as long as she understood the truth. She wasn't some one night fling, she wasn't the enemy, she was my friend. My best friend. My girlfriend. The only girl I had and would ever love. That's why I needed to go back. I didn't care how long it'd take, so long as she was in my arms again, smiling and laughing like earlier this morning. If I could get her like that again, make her mine again, then it'd be enough for me. But there was no way I was quitting on her or on us again. Whatever the cost, I'd do anything. . .

 **Just to win her back.**

* * *

 **Happy late anniversary! On the 9th of Monday I started this whole story soo yay for that! I didn't really proof read this all that much so excuse any and all errors. See Ya Next Time!**

 **-Clover**


	11. Chapter 10: You're My Weakness

**Disclaimer: Teen Titans. I do not own the characters in the show - simply, just this story.**

 **Paring: Flinx ( Kid Flash x Jinx )**

 **"Little Do You Know"**

 ** _(Alex & Sierra)_ **

_**Little do you know**_  
 _ **How I'm breaking while you fall asleep**_  
 _ **Little do you know**_  
 _ **I'm still haunted by the memories**_  
 _ **Little do you know**_  
 _ **I'm trying to pick myself up piece by piece**_

 _ **Little do you know**_  
 _ **I need a little more time**_

 _ **Underneath it all I'm held captive by the hole inside**_  
 _ **I've been holding back for the fear that you might change your mind**_

* * *

 **Chapter 10: You're My Weakness**

 **( Jinx )**

Lockers, teachers, students, books, a clock and a bell. Things were quieter. Yet I spent hours debating at home whether or not to return. There was really no point after all. The year wasn't even over but I'd be gone in less than a month. No graduation, no college acceptance, no future but one with chaos and destruction. That was my fate, my chosen path, that was my career. Forever born and doomed a villain. They didn't get that. None of them did and that was okay. They didn't have to. All they worried about were grades, exams, dances, dates. . . normal lives. I would have given anything to have just that, to trade it in for mine instead.

But I had a taste. A short, bittersweet taste. It was quick, harsh and soft all at the same time. But had it been worth it? My mind still wasn't sure. I trusted him. It was the first time I'd ever done such a thing with an outsider. One who had no real understanding of my life. It was refreshing, new and relaxing. Maybe that was why I had a hard time regretting it. Though a small part of me did, the part that felt betrayed by his words. . . I still loved him. Of course, he'd never know that again and I wasn't planning on ever admitting it. Rose had a heart for him, but Jinx. . . jinx was cold.

She couldn't feel anything at all.

"Rose. . ." There she was again. The annoying voice of my sister. Linda Park, soon to be but a memory of my past. Her along with everyone on campus and the boy they all admired. . .

"What do you want?" I asked while shoving books into my locker.

"Just hear me out this once." She began, her desperation catching my attention, "You hate me and you blame me, I get that. I won't bother you again after this, but I want you to know that I'm sorry." She grabbed my arm, "All I ever wanted was for us to be a family again, and yeah it was selfish, but I was also doing it for your sake. . ."

" _My_ sake?"

"I spent all these years searching for you with every chance I got, looking for clues, anything that would lead me to you. . ." She breathed silently, "I was fortunate enough to be blessed with a family that cared for me. They made me happy, and that's what made me feel guilty. I couldn't even go a day without thinking about you because it never felt right without you there. I wanted to share it with you, to save you. . ."

"I'm happy for you." I nodded, sliding the strap of my bag over my shoulder.

"I wanted you to be happy. . ." She whispered, removing her hand off of me, "But if you are now, if having me out of your life means you can find that happiness then I'm okay with that. I just want you to know that I was always rooting for you. I was always on your side, because you're my sister and. . . I love you."

It stung. Her words pierced my heart like a thorn in my chest. Love. I hated that word. I hated hearing it, I hated falling for it, I hated _trying_ to believe it when I knew it was a lie. She loved me, Rudolph loved me, and I'm sure my mother loved me once too - but they left anyway. All of them. Loving someone didn't do anyone any good. It was nothing but a trick used to manipulate the female race. We were a weak species. But not me. I was far from it which was why I wasn't going to believe her but. . . I couldn't help it. When she looked me at, torn and hopeless with sadness in her eyes. It was hard not to feel guilty. Though I'd already made my decision, I wanted her to know the truth. Even if Jinx couldn't, even if it were only temporary, I wanted her to know that. . .

I loved her too.

"Linda. . . I-"

"Rose!" We were both startled by the sudden cry of a boy down the hall, and like a switch I panicked.

"Sorry, I gotta go." I quickly rushed in the opposite direction.

"Wait, what's going. . ." I heard her start, but her voice fell the further away I moved.

I had to leave. I had to get out. It'd been a mistake after all. I thought I could do it. I thought I could come in without making a big deal about it, but even hearing his voice made my chest ache. Like a fist clenching my heart, it was impossible to even breathe properly. I just wanted to get away. Some place far away from him. But of course, that was impossible. There was no outrunning the fastest kid alive. Even in his civilian form he was still the fastest speed walker out of all of us.

"Rose wait!" Footsteps sped faster the further I moved. Before I knew it, he was only a few feet behind me.

"I'm late for something." I lied, refusing to look back.

"I just need one second." He pleaded as his voice sent shivers down my spine.

"Why?" I scoffed, "So you can try and make me feel even worse about myself? Pass." I burned the memory into my skull, reliving the last conversation in my head. He was the traitor, he was the enemy, he made it clear himself. If that was how things needed to go then so be it. But there was no way he was winning this battle.

"I'm sorry! I wasn't trying to-"

"Make me out as some whore?" I glanced back, ignoring the painful thump my heart made after meeting his eyes, "Well, you were right. I am. I'm just some huge slut who can't make up her mind."

"Please, just listen." He took my hand, making it burn at his touch.

"I don't want to hear it!" I snapped, yanking free before I forced myself to glare into deep pools of blue, "No one has _ever_ made me feel as disgusting as you did that day."

"I messed up. . ." He stepped forward, a hand reaching out to me as I moved back in response.

"You tricked me." My voice cracked, and I cursed myself for it, "You told me it'd be different, that I wouldn't have to choose but you lied-"

"I know, I'm sorry!" He yelled, startling me slightly.

"So am I." I cleared my throat, "I'm sorry that I thought I could actually trust you. . ." It was then that I noticed all the other eyes that watched us. He was Mr. Popularity after all. Always bringing in unwanted attention. This was for the best. We never would have lasted and I kept telling myself that over and over again when I stormed off.

"Rose, wait!" He called after me.

"It's over, West. Just leave me alone." It hurt even more finalizing it myself. Even though he'd been the first to do it, I hated admitting it. I hated feeling so weak around him. I just. . . I hated him.

Or I tried to at least.

"It can't be over just like that." His voice shook when he spoke, and I could tell he was just as close to tears as I was.

"Well it is. Move on." I told him. Trying to remind myself that if I kept saying it, made it clear to him, then eventually he'd go away.

"You're mad, that's fine, but if you would just let me explain-"

"I've heard enough as it is." I stopped in my tracks, glancing over my shoulder to stare at his shoes. Anything but his face. His shirt, his pants, his hands. . . but not his face. If I did then there'd be no denying him.

"You can't just throw everything away like that."

"Watch me." I muttered before racing off to escape.

"Rose please!" He chased after me, "I was wrong to pressure you. I won't do it again, I promise!"

"I'm sick of your promises!" I yelled, not because it was needed, but because I was scared that if I didn't scream then I'd cry again. And I was done crying over him.

"But I mean it this time!" He grabbed my arm, roughly pulling me back.

"So you never meant it before?" I snapped, brown eyes meeting with blue ones in fury. My anger was blinding me. Which was good. It meant he couldn't fool or manipulate me. . .

So he couldn't win.

"That's not. . ." He paused, staring at the hand he now clenched tightly in his, "Is it because of Seymour? Are you really going to-"

"This is about me." I cut him off, "This kind of relationship never would have worked. We never should have forced it to begin with-"

"It wasn't forced!" My back hit the wall when he pinned me up against it, "You know that isn't how you really feel."

"But I'm tired of feeling. I'm tired of getting hurt. . ." My eyes travelled to his finger tips as my own twitched at the sight. They desperately sought for his touch, his warmth, his love. . . his lies. "I don't wanna feel anything anymore."I avoided his gaze, but I could feel his on me. I just wanted it to end. All of it, all of him, all of me. I just wanted to leave. A do over, a restart button, or a time machine - that's what I needed. But no matter how hard I thought about it I realized there was no point. He'd always been there, as a kid, in my memories, on the field, on campus. . . there was really no escaping him in my past. So, the best way to forget was to head straight for the future.

"I'm sorry. . ." He choked out before placing his head on my chest. I could hear his soft sobs, and I could feel everyone watching us, but I couldn't stop the tears from shedding. They slid down my cheeks as my hand slipped into his to hold.

"We had sex. . ." I said it out loud. I had to because there was no denying what had happened, "I gave myself to you because I thought you'd be different, that everything you said was true-"

"It was! It still is!" He lifted his head.

"You threw me out!" I screamed in his face, tears streaking down my own, "You knew what that meant to me, how hard it was, and you threw me away like trash!"

"I wasn't trying to hurt you!"

"But you did. . . and I'm not going to let you do it again!" I slid my hand out of his and shoved him off. I needed to leave and I ran without ever looking back.

"Rose!" He cried out for me, chasing after with his much quicker speed. But he couldn't touch me.

I locked myself in the girls bathroom. I ran in and pressed the door shut to fight the strength he used to try and open it. Boundaries, limits, they meant nothing to him now. Even the label on the door wasn't enough to keep him out. But I fought hard to keep that door shut, despite his force and screams.

"Rose, open up!"

"Just go away!" I yelled back.

"Please, just come out and speak to me! We can fix this-"

"It's over, Wally! Just leave me alone. . ." I pressed my back against the door, leaning on it to keep him from entering.

"It can't be over. . ." He muttered before he gave up at trying to enter, "Please, just open the door." I heard him sob. I cried too. It hurt more than anything. To keep him locked out when all I wanted was to go back to the moments where holding him was a real option.

"Rose, do you. . . hate me now?" I placed a hand over my lips to seal the cries that tried to escape, my back sliding against the door as I fell to the ground, "Just talk to me, please. We can fix this. . ."

"Shut up!" I screamed, "Just shut up and leave me alone!"

It was quiet. It was so quiet that I hadn't realized I'd forgotten to breathe. The silence that lasted a good 60 seconds made me question whether or not he'd left or if he'd even been there at all. But he had given up, that much I knew. Just like everyone else. Which was good. It was great. It had to be. . .

But the pain didn't go away.

"After school, my house. . ." My head shot up at the unexpected voice, and I pressed my ear against the door to listen, "I'll be waiting for you there. I'll wait all night if I have to, but please. . . just hear me out then." I heard his feet shuffle and then disappear entirely. After that I figured it was a good sign to let it all out.

I cried on the floor. I cried till the bell rang and the halls were clear. I cried till I got outside to ditch class. I didn't want to see him. But I didn't want to ignore his request. I knew we couldn't be together anymore. I couldn't return to him, but I couldn't walk away as easily as he had done the other day. Because I was weak. I was a girl after all. A weak species, easy to fool and manipulate. That's how they get when they're in love. And I just couldn't help it. . .

Because I loved him so much.


	12. Chapter 11: I'm Sorry, Rose

**Disclaimer: Teen Titans. I do not own the characters in the show - simply, just this story.**

 **Paring: Flinx ( Kid Flash x Jinx )**

 **"Fallout"**

 _ **Mariana's Trench**_

 _ **An empty room,**_  
 _ **I'm empty too**_  
 _ **And everything reminds me of you**_  
 _ **So many things**_  
 _ **I shouldn't have missed**_  
 _ **The more that I push**_  
 _ **And the more you resist**_  
 _ **It's easy to say it's for the best**_  
 _ **When you want more**_  
 _ **While you leave me with less**_

 _ **I know you're fine, but what do I do?**_  
 _ **I know you're fine, but what do I do?**_

* * *

 **Chapter 11: I'm Sorry, Rose**

 **( Kid Flash )**

Sparks danced on the tip of the candle. It breathed in the air and radiated it's thin light across the room. Dozens were lit just for her. But The clock struck twelve, silence remained, and still there was no sign of jinx showing up. Not that it surprised me. She hated my guts. I'd hurt her in the worst possible way and the only person to blame was _me_. True, I felt betrayed, used, and taken for granted. She had chosen her family over me, she had chosen evil over good, and I hated that. But even so, I had sworn to love her despite that. I had made a promise to stand by her no matter what decision she felt obligated to make. . .

Because I loved her.

But my anger blinded me for a second and it drove her away. She had given herself to me entirely and I betrayed her in the end. Even though it was obvious to me how scared she was in that moment, shaking in my arms the entire time. But I still took her, all of her and then. . .

I broke her heart.

I couldn't forgive myself for that and I knew she couldn't either. I worked so hard only to mess it up in the end, and the only person I could be mad at was me. Me and my own stupidity. What was even worse was that I'd become exactly what she'd been afraid of all along. . .

Scum like all the rest.

"I'm such an idiot. . ." Tears melted into the hands I buried myself in. The clock was ticking louder. The emptiness in the living room remained unchanged as it did in my heart. All my mistakes, regrets, they were all crashing back into me, taking me to the many times I'd screwed up. Nothing I'd ever done was right. It all led to this, our downfall. Every tear, all the pain, the trauma she'd endured. . .

It was all because of me.

"Wally. . ." Iris came strolling from down the stairs. She watched me with concern written all over her face. My thoughts were slipping and exposing itself to her. I was slipping up again. I couldn't stop the pain from leaking out. . .

"Sorry, Aunt I. Did you need something?" I forced out a laugh to hide the sobs. But it was an act she clearly saw through.

"No, I'm just gonna head to bed now. Try not to start a fire while we're asleep." She joked half-heartedly, hoping to get me to smile.

"Of course." I quickly nodded, but a smile was impossible to keep. I was too busy trying to wipe away the tears lingering in my eyes.

"Have you heard anything from her yet?" She asked with a slow approach, quickly glancing at the bouquet of lilies that were left on the coffee table.

"No. . ." I cleared my throat, hoping it would be enough to fight the urge to cry again.

"Are you sure everything's okay?" She sat on the sofa beside me, placing a hand on my arm to comfort me in my misery. I wanted to lie to her. Or at least, I wanted to believe that everything would somehow fix itself. But I knew it wouldn't and I knew she felt it too.

"I hurt her, Aunt I. I really hurt her. . ." I couldn't hold it in anymore. The faster time moved, the slower my world spun. It was terrifying. The feeling of losing something, being so out of control, sitting around waiting for a miracle. I couldn't fight the tears, the pain needed to be released. And as I buried my face in her shoulder it all started to feel real again. The end of Rose, the end of us, the end of everything. . .

It was really over.

"She did seem upset when she left."

"You saw?" I quickly stared at the woman who nodded back.

"I caught a glimpse when she ran out of the house. . ."

"I'm the worst." I ran my fingers through my hair, yanking on strands as hard as I could. Even the thought of it made my chest ache. She was so strong, fearless, brave. . .

And I had broken that.

"Wally, you made a mistake, we all do at times. What really matters is how you go about fixing-"

"She's never gonna forgive me. She won't even try hearing me out. . ." I shook my head, convinced that the impossible was just that - impossible. She hated me, there was no way I could change her opinion, and when morning came I'd have my answer. . .

We were never getting back together.

"She may need time and space to heal before things can improve. I'm sure when she's ready she'll listen." She finished before getting back up and placed a quick kiss on my forehead to signal her leave.

"You're right. . ." I agreed, mainly because I didn't want to worry her any more. But also because I wanted to believe she was right. If she didn't come tonight then maybe she would another night. When she was ready. . .

 _Maybe_.

"But please try and get some sleep tonight."

"I'm just gonna crash here for the night." I waved her off, "I promised her I'd wait. . ."

"Alright. Goodnight." The worry didn't fade from her eyes, but she left anyway to accompany my uncle. It was late. And this wasn't anyone's problem to solve, it was just mine.

I listened to the sound of her footsteps fade into her bedroom. Once that distraction was gone I searched for another. I watched the flames flicker in the fireplace, reminding me of precious moments. Moments lost in the flames of my anger, over stupid arguments, and my jealousy. . .

I reached into my pocket and pulled out a silent phone. There was no sign of her calling, so I searched threw my gallery instead. There I gazed at the photo I had downloaded the other night. A picture of us. The only photo I had, and will most likely ever have, of the first girl I ever loved. Rose. My precious Rose.

There were so many complications, unnecessary ones. It made me crave for a chance at normality with her again. I'd give anything for it, I'd even trade in my powers for a life with her again. A life where simple problems only occurred. Dumb teenage fights over movies or junk food, rather than the war that would surely come in the future. . .

I'd give anything to save her from all of that.

"Please rose. . ." I cried at the image, the dorky, surprised look on her face made the pain even stronger. I just wanted her here, with me, laughing and smiling like before. I just wanted her back. . .

"Please, don't leave me again."

Then a knock came at the door. Midnight and I rushed over without a second thought. I was sure it was her. She came back, she was willing to hear me out, and that meant there was still hope. Everything in me lit up with hope. It burned and yearned to see her face again. But, unfortunately, that flame blew out when I found another at my doorstep. . .

"Linda?" Not Rose. But her sister.

"You really are awake. . ." She rubbed her hands together nervously, "I'm sorry, I was passing by when I noticed the lights. I didn't think you'd still be waiting for. . ."

"You heard?"

"Everyone heard you two. . ." She smiled awkwardly, trying to break the ice, "I'm sorry, it was stupid of me to come. I just wanted to make sure things were okay with-"

"No, it's fine. You wanna come in?" I offered, opening the door to make room for her. Honestly, I wasn't sure what drove me to let her in that night. Loneliness, anxiousness, fear. . . whatever it was, it was as if it were out of my control. Like somehow. . .

I couldn't turn her away.

"Uh, sure. . ." She nodded, tension falling after she stepped inside.

She strode into the living room, staring at candels and flowers left for the girl that hadn't showed. She'd given up on me. That's what kept whispering in the back of my head. I'd hurt her too many times to ever get her back. The scar I'd branded on her heart would never disappear. Just like the others. Their marks had forever been branded on her body, so much that she felt disgusted with herself. Disgusted over something she had no say in. There was no way of healing her from that. . .

And I was no better than the rest of them either.

"Wow." Linda mouthed, "You did all of this for her?"

"Yeah. . ." I let out a heavy sigh before falling back on the couch, "You haven't heard anything from. . ."

"Sorry. She and I aren't on speaking terms anymore. Not that we ever really were." She tried to laugh, but it was obvious she was hurting as well.

"That's what you two were talking about this morning?"

"You noticed?" She sat beside me, forcing a smile to hide her pain, "It's for the best. What about you two? What was all that about at school?"

"I don't wanna get into it." I got up to follow the light emitted from the fireplace, debating whether or not I should burn the flowers along with everything else. The pain, my feelings, everything that tied me to her. . . but It was impossible. There was no forgetting her. No turning back time. It didn't matter how many years passed, there was no forgetting the pink haired thief that had stolen my heart. . .

"Wally. . ." Linda came over with a hand on my shoulder. It wasn't a big deal or anything but. . .

I felt it again.

A spark. A strange spark I couldn't explain. It drew me into her like some strange force. And I knew she felt it too when she stepped back, "Um. . . you can talk to me too, ya know? I may be her sister, but I'm also your friend." She stared into me, almost _through_ me, waiting for me to open up.

I was hesitant but I knew she was right. I could trust her. She wasn't the type to go judging just anyone. She wasn't much of a gossiper either. After all, she was willing to welcome back her villainous baby sister without any doubt. She wasn't like the other girls and for that I. . .

Liked her a lot more than most.

"I broke a promise. . ." I let it out in a whisper, releasing what I'd kept locked in for days, "But only because she was being so _difficult_ about everything."

"What do you mean?" She moved in closer to find my eyes.

"I just. . ." I clenched my fists, trying my best to keep my cool, "I wasn't enough for her I guess. I didn't like being treated like second best so I-I snapped at her and. . ." It was impossible. I couldn't get through the whole story without choking on my own words. I wanted to try blaming her but no matter what I said guilt kept biting me back. The truth being that, I knew what I was getting myself into but I was still trying to change her. I made her feel attacked, like the bad guy, a monster, when in fact that was me. . .

I was the villain.

"And you think it's your fault?"

"It was my fault. . ." I corrected her, "I never should have made that promise in the first place."

"Look, I don't know what's going on. . ." She stepped forward, suddenly taking my hand, "But if she didn't make you feel important enough, then it isn't just your fault Wally."

"I know but. . ." I held her hand, sighing at the memory of Jinx, "I just feel like none of it would have happened if I'd let her-"

"Let her what? Hurt you?" She cut in, eyes locked with mine as she moved in closer.

"I don't know. . ." I shook my head. I was confused. Everything that happened since jinx entered my life had been one huge mess. And I wasn't trying to blame her for it but. . .

Nothing I did ever went right with her.

"Wally, you're a good guy and I'm not just saying that. That's why I was so interested in you. . ." She laughed quietly, staring at our fingers.

"Weren't you only interested because I was closer to Rose?" I joked, nudging her to better my mood.

"Well yeah, but I didn't need to be your friend to do that. I didn't have to go the dance with you either. . ." She began, "I thought you were really cool on campus. You're moralities were different from the other guys. You just had this different vibe and I felt almost connected to you in some weird way. . ."

I gazed into her eyes when I heard her mention that feeling out loud. A connection. I felt it too. It was strange, almost like magnets. I was drawn to her by something inside me, but the girl I wanted to be with was always somewhere else. I couldn't explain it, but it was almost like two puzzle pieces that fit perfectly together. Rose wasn't part of it but she was all I wanted. It was impossible to explain, but there was one thing that kept repeating itself over and over again in my head. . .

" _In little time you will come to know your soul mate and the love of your life, but will be forced to choose between the two. . ."_

It was ridiculous and I knew it wasn't true, but I couldn't help but question it a little. I was never a big believer in fate or even God himself. What I believed in was the fact that anything and everything could be explained physically and scientifically. The whole fortune card readings and soul mates were nothing but fantasies. I knew that, but if it were true then. . . what did that make me? I had promised to always choose her, because she was the love of my life but what more could I choose when. . .

She was choosing to leave me behind?

"Yeah, well Rose doesn't seem to feel that way. I'm just an idiot who keeps messing up whenever I try to help. . ."

"Well, maybe it was never meant to be." She came closer, placing her other hand on the side of my cheek, trying to get my attention, "I know you love her, and she's my sister but, if you're hurting because of her then no one will ever be happy. . ."

"Linda-"

"And you _deserve_ to be happy. . ."

She was so close. Our bodies were inches away from each other. I could feel her warmth through the touch of her hand and I couldn't help but crave more.

The eyes fixed on the boquet of flowers were now focused on her lips. Maybe it was the strange spark I felt holding her hand, the connection that made it impossible to withdraw from her, or maybe I was just curious to see what would happen if I gave into temptation. She was there. Rose wasn't. And the longer we stood staring the harder it became to walk away. It might have been desperation, sadness, heartbreak - whatever. But I wanted her.

We both jumped in, lips crashing against one another in a moment of heated passion. It was a thrilling experience, like electricity flowing through my veins. Kissing her was like being on fire without any pain. It was exciting, exillertating, like a new kind of rush. She was so addicting. Nothing like Rose. But I didn't want to think about that. I didn't want to compare it, I just wanted to let everything go away.

My hands ran up her shirt as our bodies pressed up against one another. We fell over on the couch, her thin frame laying under me. My heart was racing, my blood was rushing so fast. Clothes came off quickly and before I knew it we were stripped to only our underwear. The kissing, the touching, the passion was so strong that it made me want to throw away my thoughts and worries. I'd forgotten everything. I told myself I didn't want to remember. That this girl would be the perfect way to let it all go. But then. . .

Something brought me back.

Her hair was dark. Just like Rose. Soft and alluring, but the smell was different. It was different because she wasn't Rose, because Rose was gone. I had driven her away. As soon as I remembered that, everything started to come back. The sparks I felt with Linda were strong and exciting, nothing like how it was with Adams - and that was the problem. Being with Rose was soothing, gentle, soft and loving. Linda was like fire but Rose. . . Rose was warm. She was like the sun. She was comforting to be around. She made me feel at ease. There was something about her that just. . . understood me. She was perfection. No one, not even Linda could replace that, but by the time I'd realized that it was too late.

A gasp, a creak, and a draft caught our attention.

She came back. She came back for me. She was willing to listen and I. . . I screwed up again. I finally understood the truth after that. Even though I didn't want to admit it, it didn't seem like jinx was the one with bad luck. It was me. I was the web of misfortune. I was her misery. Being with me was what kept ruining her. Meeting me, reuniting, being together - it all kept failing because of me. And after seeing her standing there I knew. . .

That'd I'd been the one to curse her.

* * *

 **Authors Message:**

 **Wow. . . it's been like what? 2 months?**

 **In my defense I did leave the country so I couldn't update. Then I came back and got sick. Then my computer broke so I had to buy a new one. . .**

 **Not that it's a big deal anyway. To my little audience who still follows this story, I appreciate that very much.**

 **I'm sure you all feel bored with this whole on and off again relationship with Wally and Rose. But believe me, it's all happening for a reason. It's necessary, but I'll admit it can get boring. I did write this when I was like 10 though soo. . .**

 **yeah.**

 **Obviously, I wasn't the best story teller at that age. But I hope you'll still be around for the ending. Or at least till next chapter when we see how Jinx Reacts to ALL OF THIS.**

 **Also, I have a youtube channel running at the moment that distracts me from all of this fanfic stuff. I do fandubs and all that so if you want a good laugh or just curious to hear my voice, feel free to check that out.**

 **My YT channel name is: Clover's Voice**

 **Which I'll later be changing in a few months, because Clover isn't my Birth name.**

 **Anyway, thanks for reading this message and this chapter.**

 **See ya soon.**

 **(PS: If you notice a lot more errors/mistakes it's because I'm not proofreading anymore. Don't have the time, so I hope you'll still try and enjoy.)**

 **-Clover**


	13. Chapter 12: We're Better Off This Way

**Disclaimer: Teen Titans. I do not own the characters in the show - simply, just this story.**

 **Paring: Flinx ( Kid Flash x Jinx )**

 **"Say Something"**

 _ **Say something, I'm giving up on you**_  
 _ **I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you**_  
 _ **Anywhere, I would've followed you**_  
 _ **Say something, I'm giving up on you**_

 _ **And I will swallow my pride**_  
 _ **You're the one that I love**_  
 _ **And I'm saying goodbye**_

 _ **Say something, I'm giving up on you**_  
 _ **And I'm sorry that I couldn't get to you**_  
 _ **And anywhere, I would have followed you**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, oh, oh say something, I'm giving up on you**_

 _ **Say something, I'm giving up on you**_  
 _ **Say something**_

* * *

 **Chapter 12: We're Better Off This Way**

 **Jinx**

The roaring of thunder clouds signaled the beginning of a storm. Maybe they were a sign from God. His first and only warning to me, trying to get me to turn back. But I was so lost, confused and unsure of myself. I loved my family, my friends, my teammates. They were everything to me. They had been for years. . .

But then there was Wally.

I loved him. I loved him so much that I couldn't deny it. It was a feeling beyond my understanding. But It was so confusing. There were so many emotions running around inside me. The kind I had never experienced before and it scared me. No one stood in comparison to it, not even Seymour. But that's because he was different. I could trust Seymour, he was my partner in crime. Ride or die together. We had each others backs from the very beginning, even when we couldn't stand each other. . .

Because we were family.

Maybe that's why I chose West. He wasn't like the others. We had history, a connection, but it was nothing like family. It was something _stronger_. I didn't see him as a brother, because he was more than that. Had our situations been different, we might have stood a chance at being in a normal relationship. . .

If jinx had never been born.

"I can do this. . ." I whispered to myself after reaching a decision. I wasn't going to stay long. I wasn't going to abandon my friends. But I _was_ going to hear him out. I didn't want to lie to him or myself. My feelings, these thoughts, my uncertainty - I was sure they'd be resolved somehow when I saw his face. I hoped it would at least. Little did I know. . .

I'd only be walking into an even greater betrayal.

Half an hour past mid-night, a light drizzle of rain danced on the streets, and my guilt and anger craved some form of closure. The kind he was supposed to give me that night. But the door was unlocked, and when I tapped it once it slowly creaked open for me to enter. A gust of wind later followed, biting at my skin as a reminder of reality, and soon after, a gasp escaped my lips. . .

My eyes immediately fell on the two kissing half naked in the living room. They were laying on the couch, touching each other the same way he used to touch me. And It wasn't long after he realized that I had only just entered. The same horrified gaze was quickly met with mine in a silent moment of pain and betrayal. A _second_ betrayal. Or was this the third? At that point I had already lost count.

"Rose. . ." He whispered my name. The sound of it tore my heart into pieces. He was hovering over her, shirtless, and in only his jeans, still trying to keep our eyes locked. But I felt an even greater pain seeing the face of the girl he had been sucking faces with seconds ago. She was exposed completely, left in only her underwear. Yet she felt no shame looking up at me. . .

Almost victorious.

I breathed out a short laugh, hoping it would distract me from the urge to cry. There was nothing I could do at that point. I could only accept the outcome and walk away. There was no reason for me to look even weaker in front of him. So, I held my head up high and forced on a smile to maintain my facade. "You two enjoy yourselves." I muttered before leaving the room. At least that way I could walk away with some dignity left. . .

But things were never that easy with him.

"No, Rose! Wait!" His screams were loud and unexpected. I was sure everyone else in town had heard him too. But I didn't want to listen. I left that house just like I did the last time we were there. I didn't need an explanation and I didn't want to argue. But above all, if I was being totally honest. . .

I was just scared.

I was scared that if I saw his face I wouldn't be able to handle it. I was sure that all these feelings would explode and turn me into another sobbing mess. That's why I was so grateful to the rain. The drops of water did a great job at hiding my tears. I could smile and cry and no one would be able to tell the difference.

It was like a mask for my heart. . .

"Please stop!" He yanked my arm, showing no hesitance chasing after me without his shirt on. But it was freezing out there, and the only reason I couldn't feel it was because I felt numb inside. My heartache shut everything off to the point where I couldn't feel anything at all. But I could still sense his fingers shaking as he held me back. I just couldn't tell if it was due to guilt or just the cold.

"Let go." I ordered calmly. I didn't want to take the chance at letting my voice crack. I also didn't want him to feel like he had any real affect on me, even if he did. So I stayed calm. I stayed quiet. . .

Because I didn't _want_ him to win.

"It's not what you think."

"Not what I _think_? So you weren't planning on screwing my sister _just_ a few minutes ago?" I was blunt, but my questions needed to be direct. Honestly though, part of me was scared to hear him admit it, yet my other half comforted me with a feeling of 'I told you so'. I had always been prepared for the worst. I just hoped it'd be different with him. All those moments spent together meant so much to me. . . but his long pause proved that the situation had been exactly what it looked like.

 _Another_ betrayal.

"I can explain."

"You're hurting me." I glanced at the hand he tightly gripped. His entire arm was shaking, and I'm sure every inch of him was trembling as well. But he immediately let go and instead stood closely behind me. So close that I could feel him breathing against my neck.

"Let's talk inside before you get sick-"

"I'm not going anywhere with you." I quickly stated. There was no point in hearing him out. What he did, what _they_ did, this act. . .

It was unforgivable.

"Linda only came over because she was worried. I took advantage of her kindness and. . . I hurt you again." The sound of his whispers sent shivers down my spine. He knew what he'd been doing. What it meant, the cost, and the mess it would cause. He knew how I'd react and still. . .

He gave into temptation.

"You don't have to explain. I cheated on you first, remember?" I tried to laugh, hoping he'd use that same excuse to let me go. That way we could call it even and call it quits. But he was still so eager to keep what was already shattered. Even when we both knew there was no saving _us_ anymore. . .

"I wasn't doing this to get even!" He screamed, grabbing my shoulders to spin me around and face him, "I was just scared. I thought you weren't going to show up-"

"So you decided to find a new replacement?"

"No! No I just, I wasn't thinking. . ." The shimmer in his eyes made it impossible to breathe. He was on the brink of tears, and I hated him for it. The guilt was eating him up so much that my anger was nothing in comparison. And I hated him for that. . . because it wasn't _fair_. "I'm sorry. I should have sent her home. I should have had more faith in you. . ."

"It's none of my business anyway." I brushed him off and took a step back, "We already broke up. Whoever you decide to sleep with has nothing to do with me anymore."

"It's not like that. . ." He shut his eyes and let his head drop with the urge to give up. He was suffering so much and there was nothing I could do to stop it. We were both in pain, and it felt like that's all we were ever good for. . .

As if hurting each other was our specialty.

"It's not like I'm all that surprised. You said it before, you're a guy. You can't always keep your cool when you're alone with a girl, right?" His head shot up to look at me after throwing the same lines back in his face. They were said before to prove his love to me, and now they were nothing but words used to justify his actions "You're all the same. I was the idiot to think you could ever be different."

"I am different, Rose. _I am."_ The desperation in his tone was strong as he reached out to take my hands. He wanted to cling onto this sad excuse of a love that never should have been. Ending it was something I should have done a long time ago. Letting it play out this long was a mistake on my part and mine alone. . .

"You're not."

"I am!" He screamed, gripping my fingers with a heavy fear. As if keeping me there would change my mind.

"Well I don't care anymore." I pulled away and turned my back to him. I didn't want to see his face anymore. It hurt too much to watch him suffer alone knowing there was nothing I could do to help him.

"Then why wont you look at me?" He muttered in my ear, "If you don't care about me, why is it so hard for you to look me in the eyes?"

"Because I can't stand the sight of _scum_." I hoped that would be enough to keep him away. I thought hurting him would give me a chance to escape. So I ran thinking I could get away. Convinced I could somehow return back to the old me, back to the life I used to have before he came along and ruined it. I had finally accepted the fate I had foolishly tried to deny all these years. . . but running proved to have the opposite affect. Rather than calling defeat, my words only fueled his urge to keep me there.

"Rose stop!" He yelled, chasing me from behind. But he was hurting. _I_ had hurt him. That's why he couldn't run at full speed. He didn't want to lose me, but he was _too_ scared to _touch_ me. That's all we were ever about. More fear rather than love. It wasn't healthy for either of us. . .

That's why leaving was my only option.

"Just leave me alone!" I yelled back.

"No!"

"I'm telling you to go awa-" My mind was so caught up in escaping that I paid little attention to the puddles on the floor. One second I was racing with the devil, the next I was falling back into the pits of hell. Only then did Terra's warning to me start to make sense. But I don't think I had much to worry about when it came to falling back in line with Satan. Because honestly. . .

I had never escaped from him at all.

"Watch out!" He screamed in his urgent attempt to catch me. He grabbed my hand, wrapped me in his arms, and held me as we both hit the floor. A loud thud was heard along with the splash of water that drenched our bodies. His skin was pale, and as he sat up I noticed the deep blue his lips had faded into. He was freezing. Every inch of him was shaking, and still he insisted on staying outside with me. . .

Just like an idiot.

"Don't touch me!" I smacked his hand away and pushed him off. After that I wasted no time to get up and leave, but when I was on my feet again. . .

He stopped me.

"Wait!" He grabbed my arm. His fingers still shivering. But like a hopeless fool, he refused to let me go. And it hurt me the most. Watching him that way, seeing him in pain, when all I wanted was to save him from more heartbreak in the future. But he was so lost in the idea of a fairy tale love with me that he paid no attention to the misfortune that had been following us. . .

"I told you to let go!" I tried pulling away from him with all my might, not wanting to hurt him with my powers, but he only used that to his advantage and let me go _just_ so I could fall back onto the pavement. At that point I was tired of it. I was tired of running when he was so set on chasing me down. This wasn't getting us anywhere. Nothing was changing because he wasn't accepting the reality of our situation. If I wanted to leave, if I wanted to move on, then I had to get him to understand how I felt. He had to understand my true feelings. . .

Or we'd both be stuck in a never ending cycle of misery.

"You. . ." I paused, trying to catch my breath as our eyes met, "have no idea how much of my life you've already ruined."

"I. . ." He began, but his shame forced him to turn away, "I'm sorry."

"Is that all you can say? Sorry!?" I splashed the water beneath me in his face, hoping it would get him to look at me again. But like always, he kept on hiding. He wasn't the type to take responsibility for his actions. He never was. And I always hated him for that. "Lets stop now. I don't wanna hear anymore apologies or excuses. . ."

"Rose-"

"I'm tired of it!" I screamed, tears filling my eyes when his finally met back with mine, "I don't want to be caught between you and everyone else. I don't want to keep doubting myself anymore. And I don't want them to _hate_ me for it either. I just don't wanna do this anymore!" My sudden rant surprised him as it did me. But it was working. My thoughts and feelings were finally leaving my mind and being spoken. He was finally starting to see the truth. . .

But that scared him even more. . .

"I know I hurt you, and you have every reason to hate me. . ." He reached for my hand, holding it gently as he attempted to move in closer, "But I can't leave things like this. I know I keep messing up, but I can't lose you. Not when you're this important to me."

"If I was all that important you wouldn't keep messing up now, would you?" I fired back fast. He wasn't expecting it, but he still kept trying to win the conversation.

"You're right. I'm an idiot. . ." He nodded before bringing my hand up to meet with his lips. The soft warmth of his kiss made it even harder to keep on fighting, but that's all we were ever doing. _Fighting_. Be it as a couple or on the field, we just weren't meant for each other. "But all I want is to keep you happy. I wanna see you smiling and safe no matter what. That's all I've ever wanted Rose. . ."

His confession caught me off guard. It had always been difficult to be with him, and I assumed that was why it was easier for him to throw me away. But hearing him say such sweet things again made me feel that maybe, _just_ maybe, I wasn't the only one suffering in our relationship. But then again, the only reason he was suffering was _because_ of me. When I realized that I knew there was no way I could stay with him any longer. I had to leave. . .

For both our sakes.

"Maybe we're just not enough for each other anymore. . ."

"I can't accept that!" His sudden outburst made me jump, and the anger in his eyes hit me hard, "I know you can't forgive me right now, but I _will_ fix this. That's the whole reason I told you to come out tonight-"

"So I could find you making out with someone else?" I scoffed after taking my hand back.

"I messed up!" He cried out, tears mixing with the rain that showered over us, "But I'm trying! I _really_ am!"

"Well then maybe you should _stop_ trying!"

"I can't!"

"Why not!?"

"Because I can't give up on you!" I froze for a moment. It was short and brief, but I couldn't believe what I was hearing. As if this whole time, our whole relationship, was just him trying to convert me over to his side. Our love, our friendship, our everything - had it ever been _real_? Had he ever _truly_ fallen for me?

Or just the idea of what I could be?

"I swear, I'll never even look at another girl again if you give me one last chance."

"I know you well enough to know that you're always one to make promises you can't keep." I laughed, staring at finger tips drowning in a dirty pool of water. They flinched at my words before forming into a trembling fist inches away from my hand. He was hurting. I was hurting him. But I didn't have a choice. This. . . this was for the best.

"You're right. . ." He muttered with a simple nod, "But all I'm asking for is one last chance. I know where we stand now, and I know how hard it'll be - but I'll get stronger. That way, no matter what side we fight on, I'll be able to stand beside you one day as your equal because. . . because I love-"

His words were replaced with an echo. A loud, heavy slap made his cheek burn a bright red. But I couldn't help it. I hated hearing him speak. It was always the same thing. Just like a broken record. We'd mess up and make up, that's the kind of couple we were and frankly I was getting tired of it. Nothing he had ever said was true and maybe I was the only one aware of it, because he seemed to genuinely believe he cared about me, when really, he was only trying to help himself. Save the girl he couldn't save all those years ago. Hero's and there stupid moral code, that's why I hated them. And _especially_ him. . .

Because there was no _saving_ me now.

"Shut up."

"Rose plea-"

"No more!" I snapped, "I'm done with your stupid games."

"I'm not playing around here!" He shouted, one hand on his face while the other laid rejected by my touch.

"Just stop!" I screamed in his face, throwing fists against his chest to keep him away. I wanted to hurt him, I wanted him to feel the agony I'd been enduring alone, but no matter how hard I swung nothing change. I couldn't reach his heart, not with love or violence. And that's _why_ I hated him. . . "Because of you I've become someone I never wanted to be. Things would have been easier if I had just never met you at all!"

"Rose. . ." He grabbed my arms to stop me. Hitting him wouldn't solve anything and I eventually accepted that. The only way to hurt him was with words, and that proved to be effective when the truth came pouring out. Because I _did_ hate him. I hated him and I hated what I'd become _because_ of him. Those were my true feelings. . . but they weren't everything. I'd be lying if I said _hate_ was all that our relationship was centered on, because if that were true that meant everything had been a lie from the start. But honestly, it wasn't all that bad. There were good moments too. Precious ones I wanted to cherish forever. . .

Because I was still in love with him.

"I love you. . ." I cried out in a whisper, my hands trembling just as hard as his, "I'm in love with you and I hate myself for it! Why did it have to be you? Of all people. . . why you!?" I snatched my arm back, not wanting to have him anywhere near me. Even the sight of him hurt and I couldn't stand being around him. But when I thought about my future, going on in a world without him in it. . . I felt like I couldn't even breathe. It didn't matter how many times I'd try to deny it, hate him, or hurt him. . . I still loved him. And when he reached out to cup my cheek, everything inside me just stopped. My breathing, my lungs, my heart, my muscles. . . everything refused to function properly.

"You can hit me all you want. You don't have to believe me or trust me yet either. Curse me, zap me, and blame me for everything. . . but just know this," He muttered softly, leaning in to press his forehead against mine, "There's no one in this world I could ever love more than you."

I stared into heavenly blue eyes for a split second before they shut. And like some magnetic force, I was drawn into a sweet and gentle kiss. Not even the rain could put out the spark that warmed me up from the inside. I loved him. I really loved him. He was my weakness, my balance, the center of everything. . . and that was the problem. Rose Adams might have stood a chance at a happy life with the infamous Wally West on campus. But she was never real. She died years ago and the girl I'd become couldn't live with a distraction like him in this life. She had one goal in mind. . .

And he stood in the way of that.

"I can't. . ." I breathed out after pushing him away, "I'm not doing this anymore." I muttered my final decision in the rain before getting back up. I had to do this. Not just for my sake, or for my family, but for his. He deserved better than this. He deserved someone that could take care of him without being stuck between two worlds. Someone that could give him a normal kind of romance. . .

Someone like Linda.

"I'm done." I turned my back to him and tried to steady my breathing. But his sudden attempt at clinging onto me made it difficult to maintain.

"Please don't do this. . ." He desperately pleaded with his face buried in the mid of my back.

"It was fun while it lasted." I tried to smile when I glanced back, but that proved to be a mistake when I noticed his blood-shot eyes.

"Don't leave like this, Rose. Please!"

"Let me go." I demanded in a whisper, staring straight ahead at an empty road that represented much of my future. A dark, quiet, and lonely path. One without light, joy or love. . .

Because it was one without Wally.

"I can't!" He yelled, holding onto my waist in his desperate act to keep me at his side forever.

"Do it while I'm still being nice." I tried to hiss, hoping the glow in my eyes would scare him off. Unfortunately, all it did was get him to hold on even tighter.

"Why are you doing this!? We're not suppose to end like this!" He screamed, hiding his face in my clothing. As if that would somehow keep us together longer. He was still so young and naïve. Just like me. But it was time we grew up and accepted the facts. It was time to move on.

I snapped my fingers and watched as he went flying a few feet away. The loud thud of his body hitting the ground made my heart shatter into smaller pieces. It was an image I never wanted to see. One I hadn't thought about since falling in love with him. It was my mistake to think that a normal romance could ever exist for us. Normal was for civilians. Power was for freaks like me. . . and that's all I ever was from the start. . .

A freak.

"We were bound to end eventually. Better now then later. . ." I gave him a simple smile before continuing off on my own. But his last words pierced my ears as they echoed around the neighborhood.

"Rose, please! I'll fix this! I promise! I'll treat you better this time! Just, stay with me - please!"

That's all I heard before I turned after reaching the corner. You could still hear him, screaming words that were drowned under heavy rain. He was in too much pain to move or run, and walking away hurt more than anything. Leaving when all I wanted to do was turn around and stay, was excruciatingly painful. But his cries confirmed something for me. He really was an idiot. He stood out there convinced he was the problem, but he couldn't see that the issue had been with me all along.

I didn't ask for these powers, just like I didn't ask to fall in love. I didn't ask for any of this. I just got yanked into it without a say. Nothing in my life had ever been in my control, because my life itself wasn't stable. Being with me would surely mess him up as well as everyone else he loved. I couldn't let that happen. I couldn't sit back and watch him fall into misery because of me. This was our only option. And even as a bad guy, there were still a few people I wanted to save. This was just my way of playing hero. Because by walking away. . .

 **I was saving his life.**


	14. Chapter 13: A Soundless Voice

**_Disclaimer: Teen Titans_ _© DC_**

 ** _Pairing: Jinx x Kid flash (FLINX)_**

 ** _Sequel to: The Story You Never Knew_**

 **Warning: This chapter was written in the last hour and has not been edited/proofread. Therefore - it might totally suck. I send my apologies now in advance.**

 **Weighting**

 _ **(Jesse Rutherford)**_

 _ **We can just float away**_  
 _ **Through the sunshine and the rain**_  
 _ **Instead of just waiting**_  
 _ **Instead of just waiting**_

 _ **We can sleep for days**_  
 _ **Make my arms your favorite place**_  
 _ **Instead of just waiting for the end of our story to begin**_

* * *

 **Chapter 13: A Soundless Vow**

 **( Kid Flash )**

She saw me. In the rain, in the dark, in the crowd of faces all around us - she always saw me. She saw right through me. The real me, trapped in a box with the rest of humanity... but rose was _never_ human. She was something greater. She lived in a world outside of our box, and she had the freedom to overpass _all_ of us - but her fear always kept her chained in place. She was stuck out there, on the other side of that wall, on her own...

And I never saw her.

But she caught me every time. She saw through the façade, the lies, and hypocritical contradictions - she saw through everyone. And all I saw was a fragment of who she used to be, tied in with the girl she _wanted_ to be, disguised as the girl she _had_ to be...

The villain.

But we _never_ lived in two different worlds. That's where she had it all wrong, because we all came from the same exact place. She just stood on the other side of it. She managed to escape a _long_ time ago, but she was too scared to run any further away from us. She kept on looking back and _that's_ what kept her stuck out there...

Alone.

We were separated by a wall. A soundproof wall that gave us only an image of the people we were and the people we'd become. And no matter how hard I screamed and yelled, she could never hear me. My voice could never reach her... and neither could my heart.

Yet she somehow managed to trust me with hers. She gave it out, vulnerable and scared, but open to the opportunity because...

Because she trusted me.

She trusted me. Despite every betrayal and mistake I made on my part, she always came back. She continuously tried to convince herself that relying on me was the right thing... because I made a vow. Not with spoken words, but in the silence of her presence I swore to protect her, to love her, to cherish every moment we had together... and I broke it.

"Oh my gosh, are you okay?" A voice asked at my doorway. She was fully clothed, completely covered now that Rose had gone off on her own, as her eyes scanned my figure in concern. It was then that I'd noticed I'd been drenched from head to toe, dripping wet with a few scrapes on my skin as a result from the repeated hex's she'd thrown at me... I just didn't feel it.

I didn't feel the rain. I couldn't even hear it. All I could think about was the broken look in her eyes and the echoes of her screams...

 _"I just don't wanna do this anymore!"_

 _"I'm done with your stupid games."_

 _"You... have no idea how much of my life you've already ruined."_

 _"We were bound to end eventually._

 **"Wally!"**

"Huh?" My attention shifted to the unexpected call of the girl at my entrance.

"Are you okay?" She asked again with a hand on my arm, worry written all over her face. But I didn't know how to respond. Everything was spinning around me. I didn't know what to say at that point... so I lied.

"Yeah... yeah, I'm fine." I nodded with a fake smile and stepped inside to dry off. She followed me into the living room and I heard her talking behind me, but everything just came off sounding muffled in my head.

It was difficult to take in. The idea that it was all gone. That she was forever lost to me. Yet she would always be there, _somewhere_ out there, existing, breathing, living... without me. And I was still stuck in the past, reliving every moment that led up to our last. That first day, our first kiss, hearing her laugh, wiping her tears... holding her in bed.

That night meant everything to me. She illuminated my once dull world with a burst of colors... and then it faded. Greys and blacks were all that filled my home...

Because I let her down again.

I let down that little girl I met as a kid. That little girl in the attic, who just sat there in her bed, expressionless and numb to the world she was stuck in. That little girl who made me mad with her sarcastic comments, but still made me laugh at the same time. And it was that same little girl who broke my heart and made me cry when they carried her out in screams.

I prayed for a chance to make it up to her for years, and as a hero I worked so hard to save others like her... but I let her down all over again. I let down that little girl I couldn't save once...

And I had no one to blame but myself.

"Where's Rose?" Linda asked, peeking out the door as if she had miraculously appeared again.

"She's gone." I muttered, my voice groggy, as my eyes locked onto the flames of the fireplace. It was a constant reminder of the flames of temptation I greedily gave into...

"But you'll see her tomorrow, right?" Linda stepped back in and blocked my view, forcing me to meet her eyes.

"I don't think so." I stared at my feet.

"What do you mean?" She stepped closer. I took two steps back. My back hit the wall and I leaned up against it to run my hands through wet strands that blocked my face.

"It's over... we're over." It was harder to admit out loud. The words had been stuck in my throat for such a long time, that it was painful to let them out. And it hurt. It hurt so much that it struck my heart with a heavy lash. Tears surfaced and I didn't try to fight against them. I just gave into the pain and accepted the consequences of my mistakes...

It was over.

"No... no, that's impossible." She rushed over and grabbed my arms, "No, you two were supposed to work things out like you _always_ do. This can't... this wasn't supposed to..."

"I messed up every chance she gave me." I pulled away, "She's never gonna forgive me."

Linda stood frozen like the rest of the furniture. She didn't move, she didn't speak, and honestly, she looked just as broken as the rest of us, if not more - you could see it in her eyes. But it confused me. She was aware of her actions and the consequences that came with them... and yet she seemed so lost. The kind of lost I once felt...

Before Rose stepped into my life.

"Wally, look at me." She stepped forward and gently placed her hands on the sides of my face, "You have to find her. She didn't come all the way out here for nothing, okay, she still loves-"

"It's over Linda." I stepped back, "She's done with me. There's nothing I can do to fix it this time..." I walked past her to sit on the edge of the sofa. It was useless to conjure up a plan of forgiveness this time when I had failed miserably before. Nothing could make up for my selfish act. Nothing...

And yet she still kept on pushing.

"Well I'm not giving up." She grabbed her keys and stormed for the exit. The numbness in my body was slowly trickling away, and all I wanted to do was to sit there and heal, but my concern forced me back on my feet to follow after her.

"Where are you going?" I reached out and grabbed her arm.

"To pay my sister a visit." She yanked free, opened the door and rushed into the rain alone.

"Are you insane!?" I raced behind her, trying to stop her every time she pushed me away, "You can't just stroll into a wanted criminals home. You'll get yourself killed."

"I'm not letting it end like this!"

"You don't even know where lives!"

"Don't underestimate me." She scoffed before racing over to the drivers door, "Now do you honestly want me to drive alone in this weather or would you rather suit up and take me yourself?"

"What?" My heart dropped. Everything was pounding in my head. I didn't know what to think of her accusation, but what terrified me most was the fact that she had so much information on us that no ordinary human could've easily obtained. Which again raised the question; Who exactly was Linda Park?

And what was she after?

"Drop the act, wally." It was difficult to hear her through the rain, but my ears still caught it, "I've been watching Jinx for months. You honestly don't think I couldn't figure you out?"

"How?" I asked.

"Doesn't matter." She wiped her face as the rain began to lessen and then walked back in my direction, "Wally you can sit here and do nothing while Rose keeps ruining her life, but I'm not gonna let her be alone right now..."

"Linda, she doesn't want to see us right n-"

"We both messed up!" She cut in, "So what are you gonna do to fix it?"

"It's not that simple." I shook my head and turned away.

"I didn't say it was." She rushed in front of me, "But she's my sister and I care about her... Don't you?"

"Of course I do! But I really hurt her..." I dropped my head and shut my eyes to avoid looking into hers, "I don't know if I can face her right now."

"Wally I've seen the way you two look at each other. I know how much love you two have for-"

" _Had_."

"But it was still there, right!?" She pushed me back a few spaces, "That's not something you can just forget about in one night..." I was ready to snap back, argue, and force her to give up on repairing something unrepairable at this point... but then she started to cry. It was raining, and it was difficult to make out, but the crack in her voice made it clear that there were tears being spilled, "You never _really_ stop loving someone. That's why I _know_ she still loves you."

"She's not gonna change her mind..."

"We won't know unless we go over there and find out!" She desperately stepped forward and reached for my hands, "She's my sister, Wally. I have to see her. So are you coming with me or not?"

"...I can't." I slid my hands out of hers and moved past her to head inside. I wasn't family. I had nothing that tied me to Rose like Linda. We didn't share the same blood, or anything like that. Therefore, nothing I did or said could ever convince her to forgive me. Nothing...

"Fine!" She shouted, "But you know, love isn't something everyone can agree on. What matters is how you feel about her. Your actions are what'll count in the end. That's what'll give you two strength to overcome anything together... staying silent only means you've given up before anything's ever really started."

I listened to the sounds of her footsteps travel over puddles before she stepped into her vehicle. Her car door slammed shut and I rushed back inside before I could even listen to the engine start. I locked the door behind me and slid to the floor to rest. I didn't want to think about it, or blame myself any more than I had to... I just wanted to forget. Just for a second...

I wanted to forget about everything.

"What on earth is going on out there?" The voice of my aunt came from the staircase above me. She stepped down and walked over to sit beside me on the floor, waiting for an explanation...

"Sorry, Aunt I. I was just..." I stared at the exit and found it impossible to say anything... because I couldn't. Anything I said would've just been an excuse. I was being a coward. Like always, I was but a fraud too scared to do anything to make things better in order to prevent anything from getting worse...

But it was impossible to forget Rose.

The sound of her laugh, the thought of never hearing it again tore my heart. The idea of never seeing her smile, never having a real conversation with someone who understood me on a level no one else could... it was impossible to forget. Just like it was impossible to deny the fact that I didn't want to stay home. I wanted to see her. I had to see her. I _needed_ to. I couldn't live with the thought of leaving things the way they were. Even if it was pointless, even if it only made things worse, I had to let her know how I felt.

How I _really_ felt.

"I gotta go." I got back on my feet and reached for my jacket.

"Where do you think you're going this late at-"

"Cut my allowance if you have to." I blurted out after opening the door, "Take away my TV privileges, put me on house arrest, do whatever you want - but I have to see her."

I stood hesitantly with one foot out the door, and the other inside, because the last thing I wanted to do was worry and upset another woman in my life. But she surprised me again, like always, and smiled at me before pulling the door wide open.

"Well I guess there's nothing I can do to stop you." I smiled at the woman who always managed to give me hope. There was nothing standing in my way this time, therefore, nothing could stop me from repairing what I had damaged...

I just had to find her.

"I love you Aunt I." I kissed her cheek and raced for the vehicle still parked in my driveway, "Linda!"

There was no quitting this time around. No matter the cost, I wasn't going to let this opportunity go to waste because... Linda was right. Actions were what tore us apart, and so, only actions could bring us back together. I made a vow to her that night and I had to keep it. I made a promise to that little girl who stole my heart, and I wasn't going to turn my back on her again. It didn't matter what side we stood on, because all that separated us was a wall. And I didn't care how hard I had to pound on it to reach her, or how loud I had to scream to get her to see me again, because I wasn't going anywhere and this time...

 **Neither was she.**

* * *

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 **Though they do help keep updates rolling faster.**

 **\- Clover**


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